Muzings From The Edge:The Fear Of ????

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It has been said, and I fully agree, that everyone has their own fears that worries them from time to time if not all the time. If the last decade has not proven that then nothing ever will. The Republicans have made an art form out of fear mongering and keeping people up at night looking under their beds, in their closets, and in the bushes around their homes. It is not bad enough that we all develop a fear of any number of idiotic nonsensical things during our lives as it is they just heap more on us. I ran across a site on the web called the Phobialist that list just about everything you could be afraid of and then some. I thought I would share some of these with you folks:

Arachibutyrophobia– Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth. I am glad I never knew that existed because there was a time when I lived on peanut butter sandwiches for a while. Hell, I might have starved to death for fear of starving to death because my food was stuck to the roof of my mouth and was not going into my stomach.

Here s one I had but I just did not know I had it, thank goodness;
Automatonophobia– Fear of ventriloquist’s dummies, animatronic creatures, wax statues – anything that falsely represents a sentient being. Well, actually I was not so afraid of the dummy but I was pretty damn worried about Dick Cheney pulling old George’s strings. I think we would have gotten into a lot more trouble but either Cheney did not think even he could get George to say thermonuclear war right without messing something up. Of course he screwed us pretty good anyway because he had Chrometophobia or the fear money which meant he ignored the economy for eight years and you see where that got us. But what the hell, not one is perfect. At least he did not have Atomosophobia– Fear of atomic explosions. I mean, that was Condie Rice, right. She was the one talking about the mushroom clouds. Or maybe she just had Mycophobia (Fear or aversion to mushrooms). Who knows with that bunch of clowns. But it seems that things have changed in the last couple of years for the Repubs.

Since the last presidential election there are a whole new bunch of phobias which are making their way to the forefront for both the Demos and the Repubs. Perhaps the most notable one I have noticed for the Repubs is Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia which is the fear of long words. I mean they keep practicing by saying one of shortest words I know of, “no”. Except for Joe Wilson of South Carolina who did utter a three letter word once, “lie”. And, there is little doubt that all of the Repubs have the dreaded phobia Dikephobia. Ha! I got you, it doesn’t mean what you think it does. Even Dick Cheney has it. It is the fear of justice you bunch of perverts. The Grand Old Party party seems to be well represented by those afflicted with Ergasiophobia, or a fear of work or functioning also. After all, it does not take much to show up and say no to everything that happens just to make sure no work gets done. The one I love best is when they go out and meet with their constituents to explain what is going on in Washington. It does not matter what they say because all of their idiot supporters have a bad case of Epistemophobia which is a fear of knowledge. Tell them anything but inform them of nothing.

Now the Demos are not without their own phobias of one kind or another. If you remember early on when the Demos had control of congress you would have thought the had Arithmophobia or the fear of numbers. I mean I always thought when you had more than the other guys you won. Apparently not. It seemed that they, including the President, had a bad case of Decidophobia which is a fear of making decisions. Or Heresyphobia which is the fear of challenges to official doctrine or of radical deviation, or Neophobia or the fear of anything new. All I know is that we were all waiting for great and wonderful things to start happening, and nothing did. I do know is that they did not have Phonophobia a fear of noises or voices or one’s own voice because they kept talking a good game, but they always seemed to fail to perform.

Let’s not leave out the newcomers either even though most of them are not in politics. We know that Sarah Palin has a severe case of Russophobia (Fear of Russians). She used to watch them constantly from her front porch. But, she definitely does not have Plutophobia which is a fear of wealth because she is spending an awful lot of time getting it. Then, of course, we have everyone’s favorite Michele Bachmann who is best known for her Panophobia which is a fear of everything. Myself, I have one that has been growing inside me for a long time and it is getting worse day by day. It is called Politicophobia or the fear or abnormal dislike of politicians. I do not think it is fatal but I am pretty sure it will drive me nuts before long. Of course, at best that is a really short drive.

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About Post Author

Bill Formby

Bill Formby, aka William A. Formby, PhD, aka Lazersedge is a former Marine and a former police officer. He is a retired University Educator who considers himself a moderate pragmatic progressive liberal, meaning that he thinks practically liberal, acts practically liberal, and he is not going to change in the near future. But, if he does he will be sure to let you know.
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13 years ago

Nice one Lazer – Apparently the actress Natalie Wood suffered from ‘hydrophobia’ which means a ‘fear of water’. She drowned.

lazersedge
Reply to  Holte Ender
13 years ago

Nah, Robert Wagner told to practice swimming under water for an upcoming mermaid role. He forgot to tell her she could breathe under water. (I know, sick joke)

13 years ago

Automatonophobia might also make one loathe to view the RealDoll website. Pity.

@SJ- no kidding! I am terrified of nuclear holocaust- not just because I would die a horrible death, but so would all the animals and plants left on earth. A “phobia” is “An unreasonable sort of fear that can cause avoidance and panic” so I hardly think atomosophobia counts. It is hardly unreasonable.

lazersedge
Reply to  Mother Hen
13 years ago

Mother Hen, if it does ever happen I want to be right next to where it hits. It won’t hurt for long.

SJ
13 years ago

“Atomosophobia- Fear of atomic explosions.”
Does this one even need a name? I mean doesn’t everybody have this one?
Great post Lazer.

lazersedge
Reply to  SJ
13 years ago

Not Cheney. He loves things that go boom in the night, as long as he isn’t where the “boom” happens. 🙂

Admin
13 years ago

It is true that the Republicans work best when frightening folk. They are, at least many of them, and their media mouthpieces, real monsters.

lazersedge
Reply to  Professor Mike
13 years ago

True Mike. Always have been, always will be.

lazersedge
Reply to  Professor Mike
13 years ago

Mike no comment on Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia. I thought for sure you would have some comment about it. I can’t pronounce it but I thought it was cute.

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