Thanksgiving Story
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Panocha, a type of fudge made with brown sugar rather than chocolate, is a popular New Mexican sweet.
www.vivanewmexico.com
Also a Southwestern slang term.
Last Thanksgiving we got together at Linda’s house in Rialto. She’d emailed sign-up sheets to insure that every possible Thanksgiving dish would be on the table.Everyone had a role and knew it. The only thing missing from her calculation was the family idiocy factor.
It started with aunt Flora who was bringing the turkey that uncle Ray’s union had provided. Flora had forgotten to take the turkey out of the freezer and had chosen to compound her mistake by bringing a jello mold with canned green beans in it.
Each succeeding guest had neglected to cook their dish and instead gone the traditional party default route – a bag of ice and a 12 pack of beer. The third ice bearer was told by Linda to take the ice over to Flora’s house so her F*****G turkey won’t overheat.
The jello mold was viewed with a kind of horrified fascination, followed by a comment that it looked like something aunt Flora would bring.
Linda was undeterred by circumstances and called on a Few Good Men. Cousins Stevie and Reggie were Marines, Reggie on leave and Stevie just out.
The Objective – Stater Bros. The Mission – food to offset the horror of the jello mold. The result – while both guys might have done well on the Shores of Tripoli, Stater Bros had looked too crowded so they stopped at some kind of Qwikee Mart and bought microwave burritos and frozen tamales.
Fortunately Grandma livened things up by preparing panocha for dessert. She asked Linda what she put in her panocha. Linda told her that was kinda personal, which got some laughter. Grandma said I mean do you put pecans in your panocha? Tatiana did a spit take and said Grandma that would hurt! to louder laughter.
Someone asked the group watching football on TV if they wanted to try Grandma’s panocha. A voice called out “I ain’t never been that drunk” followed by another voice ” I hope I ain’t never gonna be that drunk“.
The panocha jokes went on the remainder of the evening, along with the beer making the microwave Qwikeemart fare almost bearable.
No one touched the jello mold. I threw the contents over the fence while aunt Flora was out of the room, the poor woman beamed with pleasure when she saw the glass bowl was empty. Aunt Flora knew a woman doesn’t have to give away panocha to make people happy.
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Ditto Bee!
You make me laugh my friend… hysterical! What good times… btw, they will ‘get you’ in the end!
Too funny, Oso!
I never knew stuff like panocha existed. Considering that flan is my #2 favorite dessert (after my own bread pudding of course) I will have to try this other delicious latin thing. Have you got a recipe to try?
Too effin funny. Sounds just like my family. And the older they are, the louder everyone has to shout.
LMAO!
You had me at the green bean jello mold.
Write the damned book!
Wonderul post Oso.
There goes another Myth…There’s not always room for Jello.
Love the post Oso..
🙂 your family is way funny Oso.
Thanks for the story, it really cheered me up. It’s also nice to know that other families can be just as silly as mine. Back in Scotland, we also make a fudge from brown sugar (and condensed milk) but I don’t think its name (Tablet) has the same conotations as Panocha.:=)
LMAO. Panocha is slang for the same thing in Costa Rica. “U-i, mae, huele que rico esta panocha.”
Another wonderful story O-man. Thanks!