Adolf Hitler has been found living in a compound in the suburbs of Buenos Aires, Argentina. The 122 year-old former 1938 Time Magazine Man Of The Year and German Führer did not resist when a bunch of kids knocked on his door and asked if they could have their ball back.
The surprised youngsters escorted the old guy to a police station, then ran home to read a history book and find out who he actually was. Sources say that Hitler enjoyed being among the jackbooted Carabinieri and cheerfully promised he wouldn’t invade Russia again. He was released on his own recognizance.
This was actually a conspiracy theory that claimed Hitler escaped to Argentina aboard a U-Boat just before the end of World War II, and lived there until he died in the mid-1980s. It makes about as much sense as all the nonsense that’s erupting about Osama bin Laden, is he dead? “It’s all a hoax to get Obama’s poll numbers up. He’s been dead for six years, they’ve had him on ice just waiting for the right political moment, until I see the pictures it’s not true, bury him sea, why not bring him back to the States . . . Moonlanding faked. . . CIA killed Kennedy . . . the Holocaust didn’t happen . . . Israel was responsible for 9/11 . . . Hitler is still alive, Obama is intentionally raising gas prices, is a Muslim, and is plotting to overthrow the world.”
I am 99 percent certain that Osama bin Laden is dead, I’m prepared to believe that he was killed on May 1, 2011, but just to be on the safe side I’m canceling plans to visit Argentina, I would hate to breathe the same air as two monsters.
I wonder if Hitler watches the History Channel, he’s on a lot.