I’m not very happy with MEN right now….

Read Time:2 Minute, 26 Second

the maddening madness of men

The Maddening Madness of Men

I’m not very happy with you men right now. I use to believe in this wonderful, romanticized dream of how art mimicked life? Ummmm, Warhol anyone???? So now, I’m trying to decipher between my own experiences, and those of my clients. Not easy.

These dating websites and commercials assure me that I will find the love of my life and the dream of my dreams. I wish I could bottle and sell that… then move to the Caribbean for 18 years without a care in the world!!

Awww, but alas, I did not. I am simply a subscriber (not yet, but thinking about it) to the love/internet Mecca of online dating. Basic questions, who do I trust, who do I think is sincere, and who do I really think posted a real picture of themselves?? (Reminder from a prior article, little trust here). And even if you did post a real picture of yourself, then what does that mean???? Who posts a real picture of themselves??? Did you not notice the resemblance between me and Pam Anderson????

And so I digress…..  I have one lovely, round four year old, a 17 year old boy crazy kid, and a 15 year old, lovin’ everything with boobies kid. Yes, I said boobies. It pains me, but it is in my 12 step program to raising a son… acknowledge what it is…. Boobies.

So, back to my single-hood…. My dating website asks me what is important to me, what I hope to achieve, and what is a trait that is required in my relationship? Geeze, is this God??? Because I pray for this every night, and if God isn’t bringing the soul mate, I have a hard time thinking Match.com will. (and, yes, I actually am Christian) — Whoa, just lost some people didn’t I???

So here I am, all Christian, single, and with kids. What’s a girl to do? Well, luckily for me, I still have my psychology practice so that I can answer that question to all those asking (and with a small deductible).  I really do love my life. I have excellent children, a job I fancy, and a state that likes to provide us heat (both in sun and guns).  I think this article must have hit me at a moment of question to myself and goals for my future life. Eventually, these kids are gonna want to leave, God love them, and then what am I supposed to do with my time? I suppose I could fill this website with stories that is on my mind, or perhaps I could travel, or learn to dance?  Regardless, it will be okay. Faith. Trust. I got this.

38 year old, single white female, …..

Comments? Observations?  If you want to just talk about men (or women) please do so in the comment section and enjoy!

About Post Author

Tamra White

Tamra has a Masters Degree in Clinical Psychology, and is a Licensed Professional Counselor for Texas. She has a private practice, which offers traditional and online counseling. You can learn more about Tamra at TWhitecounseling.com
Happy
Happy
0 %
Sad
Sad
0 %
Excited
Excited
0 %
Sleepy
Sleepy
0 %
Angry
Angry
0 %
Surprise
Surprise
0 %
0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of

15 Comments
Newest
Oldest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
RickRay
12 years ago

Engaged once, dumped, married twice, I committed then got dumped, had a 10 yr. relationship, woman was too religious, gave up on romance after having half a dozen or so relationships in between. Love is best left to the young. Let them suffer and find out what us old foggies have gone through.With a 50% divorce rate out there and my view that I don’t envy any of my friends relationships , I think I’ll stay happy and single, thank you! Friendship is the best ! Marriage should go the same way as religion and hopefully become extinct. Love my kids though!

12 years ago

Looks like you might be getting to a point where you’re more in love with yourself than the idea of love…that’s healthy!! I met the love of my life (he really loves me!!) when I did not want anything to do with commitment (after a loveless marriage and divorce), and I did not want to put up with any crap (and didn’t), but I still gave him a chance (because I hoped deep inside that love could happen). We even went dutch on the first dinner together (there are no “rules” for love). Two kids later we’re still head over heels (-:

lazersedge
Reply to  urbanpink
12 years ago

Congratulations Urban. While I never reached that level of being “in love” even with an ex wife of 28 years I am always glad to hear about others that make it.

Tamra
Reply to  lazersedge
12 years ago

True lazersedge! Cheers to all!

Tamra
Reply to  urbanpink
12 years ago

That is a great story urban… thanks! Good luck… may you have many many more!

12 years ago

Maybe I can help you out here. Could you please post a photo of yourself. Just kidding. I have a friend who has had varying degrees with dating sites. It at least got him out of the house. He’s engaged now, but not to a woman he met online.

Tamra
Reply to  The Lawyer
12 years ago

haha Lawyer…. I did actually just read an article where a couple was getting divorced because a web site didn’t match them up when they ‘tested’ it.

lazersedge
12 years ago

Tamra, realize there are different you’s and at this point you are trying to find someone who can fit the needs of all of them. The wonderful mom who is trying to be all she can be for her two teenagers and her precocious little girl, and the needs of a highly competent mental heath professional deals with the problems of of clients all day and the needs of a single woman with those individual needs for love, comfort and companionship. That bill should not be had to fill does it? It just needs to be you in a male form.

Tamra
Reply to  lazersedge
12 years ago

What an optimistic and hopeful response lazersedge. I love it. I think I’m all better now 🙂

Reply to  Tamra
12 years ago

We all have our days! Thanks for the great post, Tamra.

Wait, does this mean that the carefree move to the Caribbean is off? Say it isn’t so… 🙂

Reply to  Greenlight
12 years ago

Never know Greenlight… I might be ‘angry’ for twelve to fourteen days out of the year and need a trip…

lazersedge
Reply to  Tamra
12 years ago

Since I can only judge from your writings, and that is often a very good way of learning about a person, I think you will not have little trouble finding someone Tamra. My advice to near 40 year old daughter who is still looking for Mr right has been: First, there is no Mr Perfectly Right. So get something as close as possible who is mold-able and make him a work in progress. She is still single so my advice does seem to work that well. I hope your search is successful. Above all be careful out there on the internet.

Reply to  lazersedge
12 years ago

Spoken as a true parent!!!! As for now…. I will remain, internet, date free…. I’ve always been a traditional gal! 😉

12 years ago

Love comes easy to young people, but perhaps lust has something to do with that. As an older person one has to think outside the box. Dating sites are definitely well within the box. According to Tom Robbins you have to be an outlaw?

“Love is the ultimate outlaw. It just won’t adhere to any rules. The most any of us can do is to sign on as its accomplice. Instead of vowing to honor and obey, maybe we should swear to aid and abet. That would mean that security is out of the question. The words “make” and “stay” become inappropriate. My love for you has no strings attached. I love you for free.” – Tom Robbins

Tamra
Reply to  Holte Ender
12 years ago

Holte – I think my frustration was coming through! haha… I’m better now 😉 and back to being on the liking/loving men phase.

Previous post Michele Bachmann Stands Out
Next post The perils of Palin: Alaska investigates missing emails
15
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x