Fifteen of the Funniest Movie Lines Ever

We need a laugh. It’s been a weird week, what with the Doomsday Clock growing a wee bit closer to midnight, the whole Tebow win, those Republican debates and general malaise. It’s time for a chortle, a giggle, a guffaw, and these movie quotes are just the ticket!

(I was going to make this a contest-I’d give the quote, and you, gentle reader would have to come up with the movie-but thanks to Google, it would be more of a typing contest than a knowledge contest, so forget that. )

1. “I don’t want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.” Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

2. “And spotteth twice they the camels before the third hour. And so the Midianites went forth to Ram Gilead in in Kadesh Bilgemath by Shor Ethra Regalion, to the house of Gash-Bil-Betheul-Bazda, he who brought the butter dish to Balshazar and the tent peg to the house of Rashomon, and there slew they the goats, yea, and placed they the bits in little pots. Here endeth the lesson.” Monty Python and the Meaning of Life.

3. “Please, I beg you! For safety’s sake, don’t humiliate him!” Young Frankenstein.

4. “God darnit, Mr. Lamarr, you use your tongue prettier than a twenty dollar whore.” Blazing Saddles

5. “Hey, where the white women at?” Blazing Saddles

6. “King illegal forest to pig wild kill in it a is!” Robin Hood, Men in Tights.

7. “Stand still! How can I shoot you if you keep moving?” The Producers. (2005)

8. “So this is Hell. And there’s a crucifix in it.” The Birdcage

9. “Attention. Due to a possible camp infection, Arlene Chu’s Hollywood Grill is off limits. That is all.” M.A.S.H.

10. “Listen…do you smell something?” Ghostbusters.

11. “Oh spare me, Clark, I know your brand of family fun. Tomorrow you’ll probably kill the desk clerk, hold up a McDonalds, and drive us 1000 miles out of the way to see the world’s largest pile of mud!” National Lampoon’s Vacation.

12. “Hello, I’m Dr. Freud, but you may call me Siggy.” Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure.

13. “You ever notice how all the prices end in nine? Damn, that’s eerie.” Clerks.

14. “The central message of Buddhism is not ‘every man for himself’.” A Fish Called Wanda.

15. “Hamburgers. The cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast.” Pulp Fiction.

Now, if you feel the need to compete, feel free to give the character name (and the actor’s name if you’re just that awesome) who spoketh each of these quotes. I will personally mail the winner an invisible pony.

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %