Women our stress may be killing us

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I don’t take days off. Most women I know don’t take days off. When we’re not working, whether from home or from an office, we’re cleaning, raising kids, dealing with bills and husbands or partners and trying to live up to some imaginary expectation of perfection. And you know what? Striving for that unrealistic goal may be killing us.

A study from The Families and Work Institute, published in the April, 2012 issue of Real Simple magazine found out of the 3,000 women studied, at least 50 percent felt they did not have enough free time and a whopping 60 percent said they felt guilty for spending time on themselves. I know that feeling, don’t you? Oh, I can go another month without a haircut, but the kids need to get in, and the hubby really needs one before his business trip, did I pick up the dry cleaning, oh my God that report has to be in by tomorrow, my deadline is an hour away, what the hell am I going to make for dinner? Ring any bells?

We have to find ways to deal with our stress. Being stressed can cause an increase in cortisol, aptly named the stress hormone. If you’ve ever had insomnia, you may remember seeing ads for diet pills that mention cortisol, advertising it as the main cause of belly fat. Cortisol is responsible for the flight or fight response we have-it boosts our adrenaline and energy. It also, when released in response to stress, can raise your blood pressure, impair your cognitive skills, cause diabetes and bone thinning.

The Families and Work Institute, the research group who performed the study, recommends that women delegate and find time just for them. For some reason, women are loathe to do this. We may loathe it to an early grave.

I learned five years ago to delegate. It took me almost two years not to stand behind my husband, anxiously watching him do the laundry or make cookies. I still don’t let him make the bed, on the off chance that Architectural Digest shows up to take photos of our house. His joke, not mine.

According to the study, nearly 50 percent of women would not hire household help, even if they could afford it. I wouldn’t. I would LOVE it, but there’s no way anyone else can clean this house as well as I can. They can, but good luck convincing me of that. And out of the 3,000 women in the study, 75 percent would not hire additional childcare, leaving many working mothers struggling to maintain balance.

We think we’re jugglers, but we’re not. Parts of our lives get left behind or ignored when we refuse to take a break or ask for help. Cortisol is a necessary hormone, but when you have too much of it, you run the risk of having very serious health issues. Women are running that risk every day.

What can we do? The study says yoga, meditation, a better diet and exercise. We could all use more exercise and we all need to eat better. But many of us can’t afford a yoga class, and meditation may not be an option either. So, here are a few suggestions friends and I have used over the years to help relax:

* A small piece of dark chocolate, preferable organic, in the afternoon with a glass of water.

* Whether you work in an office or at home, take 15 minutes out of every hour and stretch.

* Keep a journal. Use it, even if it’s just a few sentences, every evening.

* Chamomile tea before bed. It works well, has no side effects and soothes your stomach as well as your mind.

* Laugh. A lot. Have a tickle fight with your toddler, or sweep your spouse off their feet in the kitchen with a huge kiss. Let your teenager beat you at a video game. Remember that your family loves you, and needs you, and the best way to take care of them is to take care of yourself.

Do you have a proven stress reliever? Please let us know here at Mad Mike’s!

Thanks to KSL.com for information in this article.

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About Post Author

Erin Nanasi

Erin Nanasi is an avid underwater basket weaver, with a penchant for satire and the odd wombat reference.
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