Obama to implant RFID chips in your children

About Erin Nanasi
Erin Nanasi is an avid underwater basket weaver, with a penchant for satire and the odd wombat reference.
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I thought the time traveling to Mars conspiracy was rich, but it turns out, there are more from whence that came. The most recent face palm, head desk thinking comes straight from the wrong wing fringe, and it concerns RFID chips. It’s spreading like wildfire throughout seriously bizarre websites, and it had been debunked quite extensively. But as we all know, facts don’t matter to these folks.

My friend, Sheila, first brought this to my attention on Facebook. Another friend had made a comment about RFID chips, and since I live in the real world, without foil on my windows or a bunker in my backyard, I had no idea about any of this. Whoo doggy, was I missing something. Using the ever efficient Google search, I found Alipac.us, and an article about the Obama administration implanting everyone who did not have health insurance with RFID chips. Here’s a snippet from that article. Blog. Nonsensical and poorly written crazy ass diatribe. (Note: this rumor first reared its ugly head in 2010, which is the date of the Alipac.us piece.)

On Sunday March 21, 2010 the Senate Healthcare bill HR3200 was passed and signed into law the following Tuesday. Like I said before, there are a legion of horrible and just plain evil aspects to this bill and I’m sure you’ve heard a lot them by now. I don’t want to discount them but what cannot be missed here is this new law now opens a prophetic door on a magnitude not seen since the reformation of Israel.

This new law requires an RFID chip implanted in all of us. This chip will not only contain your personal information with tracking capability but it will also be linked to your bank account. And get this, Page 1004 of the new law (dictating the timing of this chip), reads, and I quote: “Not later than 36 months after the date of the enactment”. It is now the law of the land that by March 23rd 2013 we will all be required to have an RFID chip underneath our skin and this chip will be link to our bank accounts as well as have our personal records and tracking capability built into it.

The article/psychotic rant goes on to quote from (get ready) Ron Paul’s website:
Buried deep within the over 1,000 pages of the massive US Health Care Bill (PDF) in a “non-discussed” section titled: Subtitle C-11 Sec. 2521— National Medical Device Registry, and which states its purpose as…….. He quotes that part of the law and then goes on to say: “In “real world speak”, according to this report, this new law, when fully implemented, provides the framework for making the United States the first Nation in the World to require each and every one of its citizens to have implanted in them a radio-frequency identification microchip for the purpose of controlling who is, or isn’t, allowed medical care in their country”.

The Daily Paul also wrote an article about RFID chips, stating that the claim is, in fact, false. However, rabid Paulbots railed mightily against this sanity, and one went so far as to post a video about CYANIDE-laden RFID chips. Godlikeproductions.com has a 9 minute video, also promoting this myth, and Before It’s News.com posts an article from Polidics.com, all about RFID chips being implanted in American citizens, against their will, by 2013.

I read these articles, I watched these videos. I think I deserve a prize for that.

As my bullshit meter rang loudly in my head, I remembered that Sheila had posted a link to Snopes. I love Snopes. They help get me through some of the weirdest stuff, RFID chips included. Snopes took on an email that people are receiving, detailing the government’s plans for implanting these chips in American citizens. Snopes includes two such emails at the beginning of their piece, and labels them FALSE. Snopes then goes on to prove it:

First off, the page numbers and language referenced in the example above were taken from HR 3200, an early House version of health care reform legislation that was never passed by Congress.Passages cited from HR 3200 are therefore irrelevant, as that bill was never signed into law.

Second, the now-irrelevant language of the unpassed HR 3200 (and similar language in the subsequently passed reconciliation bill, HR 4872) did not mandate that anyone be implanted with any type of microchip or device, for any reason. The passages quoted above reference a section which simply calls for the creation of a registry that would allow the Department of Health and Human Services to collect data about medical devices ‘used in or on a patient’ (including devices which patients consent to have implanted in them during surgery, such as pacemakers) for purposes that include tracking the effectiveness of such devices and facilitating the distribution of manufacturer recall notices.”

I know, the reality isn’t nearly as scary or appealing to the fringe, but there it is. No RFID chips, no cyanide, no bar codes on your scalp. The end of days is not here, we are not being tracked via implants and these people really need to get outside and maybe play a little Frisbee. Have an iced decaf coffee. Calm down.

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Posted by on July 3, 2012. Filed under COMMENTARY/OPINION. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry
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12 Responses to Obama to implant RFID chips in your children

  1. E.A. Blair Reply

    July 3, 2012 at 12:27 am

    This is nitpicking, I know, but you’ve touched on one of my pet peeves.

    The word “whence” means “from where”.

    Therefore, the phrase “from whence” means “from from where” and is redundant.

    If you’ve ever been annoyed by “ATM machine” or “PIN number” you can sympathize.

    Please don’t get me started on the reason I hate “reason why”.

  2. Erin Nanasi Reply

    July 3, 2012 at 8:00 am

    whence (hwns, wns)
    adv.
    1. From where; from what place: Whence came this traveler?
    2. From what origin or source: Whence comes this splendid feast?
    conj.
    1. Out of which place; from or out of which.
    2. By reason of which; from which: The dog was coal black from nose to tail, whence the name Shadow.
    [Middle English whennes : whenne, whence (from Old English hwanon; see kwo- in Indo-European roots) + -es, genitive sing. suff.; see -s3.]
    Usage Note: The construction from whence has been criticized as redundant since the 18th century. It is true that whence incorporates the sense of from: a remote village, whence little news reached the wider world. But from whence has been used steadily by reputable writers since the 14th century, most notably in the King James Bible: “I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help” (Psalms). Such a respectable precedent makes it difficult to label the construction as incorrect. Still, it may be observed that whence (like thence) is most often used nowadays to impart an archaic or highly formal tone to a passage, and that this effect is probably better realized if the archaic syntax of the wordwithout fromis preserved as well.

    Free Dictionary.com, which I visited when I had questions about the use of “from whence.”

  3. Anonymous Reply

    July 3, 2012 at 9:10 am

    Nice pic, but this grammar nazi agrees with Blair.

  4. Erin Nanasi Reply

    July 3, 2012 at 9:37 am

    Just out of curiosity, is anyone actually reading the article, or simply picking apart debatable grammar? I’m going with the picking apart, in which case, thanks ever so much, since I didn’t work hard on this or anything. Geez.

    • Michael John Scott Reply

      July 3, 2012 at 9:48 am

      I read it. Loved it!

    • E.A. Blair Reply

      July 3, 2012 at 10:48 am

      I did read the whole post, but the debatable grammar is something that sticks with me and gets in the way of concentrating on the subject matter. It’s like having the mosquito bite in that part of your back that you can’t scratch or the Muzak that makes you forget what you came to the store to get.

      That said, I think it’s probably a good idea to invest in Reynolds Corporation, since all those hats are going to create a huge demand for tinfoil.

  5. Sheila Reply

    July 3, 2012 at 12:06 pm

    As I told Erin, one of my fellow classmates in my Master’s in Health Law program announced to the faculty thesis review panel that she intended to do her Master’s thesis on the “hidden Anti-Christ mandate in ObamaCare.” Initially, I laughed out loud – LOUDLY – thinking she was being a comedian. Then when we all realized she was SERIOUS, our collective jaws dropped.
    (she was subsequently “counseled” out of the program thankfully. I would hate to have spent $50,000 on a degree that would then be represented by this whackadoodle and therefore de-legitimized in the field)

    • Erin Nanasi Reply

      July 4, 2012 at 10:17 am

      I remember you telling me that. I almost fainted.

  6. Bill Formby Reply

    July 3, 2012 at 12:30 pm

    Good read Erin. It is difficult enough to explain the twisted thinking of the idiots of the right wing fringe, but even more so when a single word distracts whats appears to be an otherwise intelligent reader from the overall message.

    • Erin Nanasi Reply

      July 4, 2012 at 10:18 am

      Bill, thanks. The paranoia is astounding, and no matter the facts, they just keep right on believing this junk.

  7. elmolle Reply

    January 1, 2014 at 5:41 am

    what a noob!

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