All the Single Mommies

About Erin Nanasi
Erin Nanasi is an avid underwater basket weaver, with a penchant for satire and the odd wombat reference.
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As a former single mother, it was a bit of a jaw-dropping moment when I listened to Mitt Romney blame single parents for gun violence and giving birth to future Mexican drug lords. As a Beyonce fan, I knew immediately what I had to do: take “All The Single Ladies” and rewrite it for Mitt Romney.

I pulled out my Women’s Trapper Keeper Binder of Doom (mine’s pink with big yellow polka-dots stuck to it, what color is your super special Romney binder?) and penned a little something for all the single moms. With a big thank you to Beyonce, I present “All The Single Mommies.”

All the single mommies, all the single mommies

All the single mommies, all the single mommies

All the single mommies, all the single mommies

All the single mommies

Put your guns up

Romney says

Single moms

Are causing all this gun play

No dad in sight

Kids just might

Shoot up the mall next Monday

He’s all like this

He’s all like that

Don’t pay him any attention

Romney’s got

No plan at all

Just binders for the ladies

‘Cause if he liked us then he wouldn’t lie about us

If he liked us then he wouldn’t lie about us

Don’t be mad when he doesn’t want to make a fuss

‘Cause if he liked us he wouldn’t lie about us

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

(Chorus repeats)

He’s got binders filled

With gals that he

Never would have hired

In Romney’s world

If you’re on the pill

Odds are you’ll get fired

I don’t need no permission, did I mention

Don’t pay him any attention

“Cause he had his turn, and now he’s gonna learn

What is really feels like to lose us

(Chorus)

Don’t treat us to the things of the world

We’re not those kind of girls

Respect is what we prefer, what we deserve

Where’s a man who likes us and won’t insult us

And delivers us to a destiny

Of equality and discovery

Show us that we count

Say we’re the ones you hear

If you don’t

You’ll never win

And like a ghost, you’ll be gone

“Cause if he liked us then he wouldn’t lie about us

If he liked us then he wouldn’t lie about us

Don’t be mad when he doesn’t want to make a fuss

“Cause if he liked us then he wouldn’t lie about us

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.


Beyonce – “Single Ladies” OFFICIAL MUSIC VIDEO by vidsuperstar

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 All the Single Mommies
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Posted by on October 18, 2012. Filed under COMMENTARY/OPINION. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry
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10 Responses to All the Single Mommies

  1. Farsight Reply

    October 18, 2012 at 1:36 pm

    Good work Erin. You’ve hit it out of the park again. This website compliments your writing and you guys are a good fit.

    • Erin Nanasi Reply

      October 18, 2012 at 3:33 pm

      Thank you! One problem-I can’t get that song out of my head. :)

  2. Dale Fisk Reply

    October 18, 2012 at 5:40 pm

    Erin you’re not the only one who can’t get that song out of your head! I love it.

  3. lincoln82 Reply

    October 18, 2012 at 5:55 pm

    Can you believe this Romney Erin?? What a guy huh? I don’t get why so many women ARE voting for him. Fun song rewrite.

  4. randyfun86 Reply

    October 18, 2012 at 7:34 pm

    Ha! Ha! I luv this.

    Don’t be mad when he doesn’t want to make a fuss

    ‘Cause if he liked us he wouldn’t lie about us

    Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

    Ha! Ha! Ha!!! Sharing all over the place.

    • Erin Nanasi Reply

      October 18, 2012 at 8:22 pm

      Thanks so much! I’m just glad I got remarried, or else my son would be armed with an AR-15 and selling meth out of the back of our Pacifica.

      • Jess Reply

        October 18, 2012 at 9:46 pm

        What a slacker you raised, he should be selling bath salts too ;)

  5. Jess Reply

    October 18, 2012 at 9:47 pm

    I left my own Amazon binder review for the wimmins.

  6. leftwhip66 Reply

    October 18, 2012 at 11:37 pm

    Eeehah! Lovin’ on this. Bring it home. Those of us who have vaginas know we don;t need aromny in the way of our our play.

  7. Carol Maietta views Reply

    October 19, 2012 at 8:48 am

    Great post Erin. I was a single Mom and I guess after hearing his dumb comment, I should be happy my son is a successful environmental scientist…oh, that would make Romney very unhappy too.

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