- CRITTER TALK
I’d of course want either Walter Hagen or John Daly in the group since they would supply the booze. There are only two cures for “yipping” putts. Booze or a long putter which the USGA decided to make illegal to piss me and PGA tour pro Keegan Bradley off. The USGA loves Fred Couples and would have left it legal had it not been for their contempt for me and Keegan. I don’t even know what we did to piss them off.
Like him or not, Tiger Woods is in everyone’s all time foursome. Except for lady golfers. The prudish ones at least who hate all male fun. He of course was in mine until I read about a young lady named Susie Doyans.
Susie isn’t a real good golfer. Neither am I. She hasn’t broke 100 yet. But she’s accomplished more than just about anyone I can think of. A doctor told Susie’s mother it would be best to leave her in an institution. Her mother, obviously a woman of intellect and goos sense ignored the doctor’s advice. Susie learned to write at six years old. She didn’t speak for 20 years except a little to her mom. Now she gives speeches for Special Olympics. And she’s won medals for her golf she hangs on her wall.
Normally I ignore feel good stories. But my granddaughter has Downs Syndrome just like Susie. I understand the shyness. Fortunately we know more about Downs and are better able to deal with it. And hopefully my granddaughter will pick up a golf club one day and enjoy the game of a lifetime. Just like Susie.
So it comes down to this. There’s only room for four people at my fantasy tee time. Me, Gary Player and Walter Hagan. Tough break Tiger. You’re out. I’m playing 18 with a real hero. You’re on the tee Susie!