4 Reasons Why DOMA is Like Pearl Harbor
Read Time:2 Minute, 29 Second
If you’re looking for yet another reason to eschew religion, Lisa Van Houten of the American Decency Association, one of the more fanatic bands of Christians, is warning that the Supreme Court’s DOMA decision “will live in infamy” just like Pearl Harbor.
Van Houten insists that pastors will “be prosecuted for preaching” against homosexuality and refusing to perform same-sex weddings, people will be “charged with discrimination” if they don’t “embrace homosexuality,” anti-gay groups will lose their non-profit status, and, worst of all, America will face the most terrible suffering of all: divine punishment.
As we look back on history there are dates which we now see were crossroads, turning points for nations and cultures. July 4, 1776; June 6, 1944. December 7, 1941; January 22, 1973. Battles fought, decisions made – some establishing goodness and justice, others are dates that “will live in infamy.”
I believe today, June 26, 2013, is the latter. A date when the United States Supreme Court ruled in favor of same sex marriage, and undermined true marriage – one man and one woman – which was instituted, not by any government, but by God.
The homosexual agenda cannot and will not abide peaceably alongside the true, biblical institutions of marriage and family as ordained by God. As the homosexual agenda is legitimized – even by the United States Supreme Court – marriage, family, and our religious liberty will be undermined.
Consider the following short list of what may be in our future :
1. Hate crime laws will be increasingly instituted and enforced. Will pastors be prosecuted for preaching what God’s Word says regarding homosexuality and refusing to perform same sex “marriage” ceremonies?
2. Homosexuality will be a protected class by the government. Christian school teachers and administrators, pastors, business owners, etc. could be charged with discrimination if they speak out against or refuse to embrace homosexuality.
3. Organizations such as our own American Decency could easily lose their (c)3 tax-exempt, non-profit status as we continue to call homosexuality what it is – SIN.
4. God will not bless a nation that puts a stamp of approval upon that which he calls an abomination. The evidences of God’s displeasure are evident and becoming more so with each passing day.
We are rapidly coming upon a time when a handful of unelected, increasingly politicized appointees are demonstrating that their allegiance to the U.S. Constitution and to natural law is under question.
However, God’s law supercedes man’s [sic]. As Christians, we must defy man’s law if it requires us to break the law of God.
So, that’s the “gospel” according to the American Decency Association, a veritable pantheon of ignorance, contradiction and hypocrisy that is the hallmark of religion. The one saving grace of these nonsense chatterers is the more they chatter the more secular our country is bound to become.
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I LOVE this E.A. Thanks for sharing and I think this would make a great standalone post if you don’t mind 🙂
Feel free
Wow! Great discussion folks. Karl, I don’t think I have met you here below but welcome to MMA. You, Jim, and James really brought a great intellectual but satirical twist to the post. And none can ever miss Jess and Rachel.
Hmm, should Racheal and I begin having a case of the butthurt sadz because we are not so intellectual like $ister Grifter, Our Lady of Perpetual Victimhood or Crazy Eyes are 😉
Have I shared my ode to Ms. Charlie Manson Eyes here? In case I haven’t, here it is, with background information:
A while ago, I came across some old recordings I’d made of The Muppet Show. One was the show from March 1978 that featured Alice Cooper as the guest. As I was watching, it occurred to me that in every picture of Michele Bachmann I have ever seen, she looks far, far more deranged than Alice Cooper does when (with full makeup) he is trying to look crazy.
This is the episode that started off with Scooter coming in to the guest dressing room to find Vince Furnier applying makeup while surrounded by monster Muppets.
Scooter: Uh, sir? I think there’s something you should know.
Alice Cooper: Yes?
Scooter: These monsters aren’t ours!
Alice Cooper: I know. They’re mine!
Anyway, I was inspired to look up the lyrics to an old song and alter them a bit (It’s Bette Davis Eyes, written by Donna Weiss and Jackie DeShannon in 1974 and made a hit by Kim Carnes in 1981):
Charlie Manson Eyes
Her speech is Glenn Beck gold
Her grimace sweet surprise
Her heart is always cold
She’s got Charlie Manson eyes
She’ll turn her rhetoric on you
You won’t have to think twice
Cold as Minnesota snow
She got Charlie Manson eyes
And she’ll tease you
She’ll unease you
All the better just to sleaze you
She’s precocious and she knows just
What it takes to make a Rove blush
She got John Boehner teary cries
She’s got Charlie Manson eyes
She’ll take you to the cleaners
It whets her appetite
She’ll lay you on her slab
She’ll take a dump on you
Roll you like you were dice
Until you come out blue
She’s got Charlie Manson eyes
She’ll expose you, when she snows you
Off your feet with the crumbs she throws you
She’s ferocious and she knows just
What it takes to make a Rove blush
Republicans think she’s a guy
She’s got Charlie Manson eyes
And she’ll tease you
She’ll unease you
All the better just to sleaze you
She’s precocious, and she knows just
What it takes to make a Rove blush
She got John Boehner teary cries
She’s got Charlie Manson eyes
She’ll tease you
She’ll unease you
Just to sleaze ya
She’s got Charlie Manson eyes
She’ll expose you, when she snows you
She knows ya
She’s got Charlie Manson eyes
MM’s is to work as a fresh keg at the frat house is to studying on the night before finals.
All hail Smitage and the RCMP.
Oh man. Now you tell me all those frat parties I attended in college were of no help to me. I should have listened to the ‘rents when they would go on and on about my partying instead of studying. Like Jim Carrey says, Smite me, oh mighty smiter and he was smote? smoted? smitted? smitten?
Excellent conjugation of smite, but you missed the most important one: smut. Past participle.
And for our Canadian friends: Hockey.
All hail!!!
All Hail Marx & Lennon! How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When You’re Not Anywhere at All?
This was me. For some reason, I end up getting tagged as “Anonymous” every so often.
If you sign into MMA using the “log in” at the bottom of the page, you will always end up with your name as the comment author. I sent you log in information but will be happy to resend. Just let me know 🙂
I, too, am logged out at random. I’ve told the system to remember me, but every so often, it forgets me and I’m “anonymous” again. I feel so ashamed. 🙂
LOL….Even I get logged out at times, and I can also end up “anonymous” which is not always a bad thing 🙂
From your department of redundancy department? Shoes for industry; shoes for the dead!
I sent this to my super religious friend, who said that if I ever sent anything like this to her again we wouldn’t be friends. So, I sent her the one about the underage boys being pimped by priests. We’re not friends anymore and that’s OK by me!
P.S. Before my edit thingie goes away I just learned how to do the link thing. I always envied Jess for her links 🙂
Rachael,
I urge you to send your former friend another for good measure.
This one’s a double whammy.
Source: Al Jazeera…it’s available elsewhere, but why not use a “terrorist sounding” source?
And then there’s the priest smuggling $26 million.
http://www.aljazeera.com/news/europe/2013/06/2013628155148888475.html
Her head may explode.
Well Racheal that’s a friend not worth being around if they get bent about facts, getting in the way of their bullshit.
You should have asked about linking things, someone would have helped you. I still have problems when I try to embed a video here, that I think may be a good add to a discussion. Mike or someone always has to make it fit in the comment box because I always forget to make them smaller to fit. Next time you don’t understand how something works, ask and one of us will show you how.
Sorry, I do apologize for some of my bluster in point 4. My trying to stress letting gay people (OMFG) marry will not necessarily bring economic wrath upon a nation crossed a bit into VERY un-Canadian chest beating.
No apologies necessary over here Karl. As a matter of fact chest beating is not only allowed it is encouraged, Canadian notwithstanding 🙂
Don’t be sorry at all. It was an excellent rebuttal to the idiots here that keep saying we’re doomed, DOOMED I tell you, if “teh gheyz” get married or if we accept everyone as they are.
If what Lisa Van Houten predicted comes true, it’ll be a throwback to the days just before the American Revolution when, in Virginia, Baptist and Methodist ministers were routinely jailed for preaching without a license (ah, the joys of state-sponsored churches). Of course, the Anglican officials in charge of issuing those licenses refused to grant them to members of denominations of which they disapproved.
Meanwhile, a note to Jim Moore: since Van Houten’s first name is Lisa, I suspect that the correct pronoun is she not he. You’d have to pull down her underwear to be absolutely certain, and I wish you luck in trying to do so. Not a lot different than any other religious fanatic, but with different plumbing.
Damn you, gender pronoun police! Guilty as charged.
I am also a bigot in that I assumed Van Houten was a man, because women aren’t usually that stupid. But then again, I forgot about Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachman. Curse you, gender-defying stupidity!
The best suggestion I’ve ever seen for a gender-neutral pronoun for the English language is a contraction of the phrase “he or she or it” and it’s spelled “h’orsh’it”.
LOL LOL! I won’t forget that anytime soon E.A. 🙂
Hmmm let’s look at what happened in Canada since we made same sex marriage legal 10 years ago:
– 1. Hate crime laws will be increasingly instituted and enforced. Will pastors be prosecuted for preaching what God’s Word says regarding homosexuality and refusing to perform same sex “marriage” ceremonies?
No. Never happened. Same sex marriage legislation was carefully written so no church could be compelled or would face legal sanction.
– 2. Homosexuality will be a protected class by the government. Christian school teachers and administrators, pastors, business owners, etc. could be charged with discrimination if they speak out against or refuse to embrace homosexuality.
In Canada, we do have hate crime laws. They were in place long before same sex marriage. Canadian hate crime laws would not survive a court test in the USA, however. (Yes, we can lock up holocaust deniers.) The USA lets the klan have parades without legal sanction. You think some how gay people (10% of the population) are going to get free speech laws amended when Jews, blacks, Hispanics, Asians, Hindus, Muslims, and Catholics (which probably collectively form a majority) can’t get the klan legislated out of existence? Heck, the God Hate Fags people continually offend 99.9% of everyone and the courts let them merrily continue.
– 3. Organizations such as our own American Decency could easily lose their (c)3 tax-exempt, non-profit status as we continue to call homosexuality what it is – SIN.
I don’t recall any Canadian organization losing its charitable, tax exempt status. If pastors can endorse candidates from the pulpit and not lose their tax exempt status, in blatant disregard for the rules, not really sure what IRS statute has some “don’t say gay” shotgun clause.
And our churches are entirely free to keep calling homosexuality sinful without losing tax exempt status. We’ve not locked up or sanctioned any priest or pastor.
– 4. God will not bless a nation that puts a stamp of approval upon that which he calls an abomination. The evidences of God’s displeasure are evident and becoming more so with each passing day.
Let’s see. In that 10 years of same sex marriage in Canada, our banks remained solid and profitable through the 2008 economic melt down. Canada creates more jobs per capita than the USA. We’ve not been hit by any major god-like disasters: no quakes, hurricanes, etc. Okay, there was some flooding in Calgary. That was a rough day. And oddly, that’s Canada’s bible belt. But every year Toronto hosts a massive, huge, wild gay pride weekend celebration. Families take their kids downtown to watch the gay pride parade. And god has never hit it with a tornado, quake, hail, boils, frog rain, or a terrorist attack.
Maybe the USA’s troubles (which seem largely economic) are from politicians happy to profess their religious credentials but never profess clear economic ideas or solutions. And voters willing to vote for politicians who profess religious credentials over candidates with clear solutions. Here in Canada it’s the exact opposite. No one has a clue what religion our PM belongs to. And he’s the single most publicly religious PM our nation has ever had, because, I think, he mentions it sometimes. Or his wikipedia page does. Bear in mind, he’s gone out of his way to quash anti-abortion and gay marriage debate. And he sung John Lennon’s “Imagine” on national TV. No (successful) politician glad hands with pastors or priests at election time. No (successful) politician runs on a “family values” platform. No major party candidate wheels out his spiritual adviser. We vote for our parties based on economic platforms.
Karl, you just took all the fun out of it. If we can’t count on God to do some Godly ass-kicking and other Godly pissed-off stuff, then WHAT exactly CAN we count on???? Huh?
As for all that other legal stuff, you know that’s all just a trick by the heathen lobby to fool SCOTUS liberals into thinking it’s safe to come out of the closet.
As for you Canadians and your “no-depressions” and “no-big-natural-disasters” policies…that’s just boring. Where’s your sense of adventure?
Hell, if this is how it’s gonna go, Van Houten underestimated the impacts! Eh?
Hmm, it seems like Brazil is also heading for some godly ass-kicking, too. São Paulo hosts the largest gay pride parade in the world and I have seen similar marches even in very small towns.
Even worse, in all of Brazil, there has been exactly one hurricane in the last 450 years. That one was in the São Paulo area, about 6 years ago, so maybe that was something?
As far as earthquakes, tornadoes, and volcanic eruptions, nope, nope, and nope. In the town where I live,João Pessoa, there is one bar I know about where gays sometimes congregate but it is far from exclusively gay. There never seems to be any trouble there. I have a friend that is the head of the closest police station and I’m sure he would know if there were.
I guess we can “all just get along” if we want to.
Wow. Thanks Karl. That is some interesting information indeed.
Look at you all show offy, with yer Canada is better because we tolerate everyone nonsense 😉 Their god is just waiting for you guys to get all comfy, then and only then will he get to delivering almighty smitage worth writing home about. Some of us do try and vote for the best interests of the country but right now the tamborine bangers take up all the oxygen in the room.
Eh?
Hoser/ hosehead, said in my very best Bob McKenzie voice 🙂
Nothing like a little old fashioned but almighty smitage I always say…kinda like the smell of napalm in the morning.
I think Van Houten is correct about all four points…and so it SHOULD be.
Van Houten may wish to consider that the evidence upon which he bases his claims that same-sex sex (by focusing on “homosexuals”, he seems to conveniently overlook the ladies and lesbian behavior…perhaps because EVERYONE agrees, in the words of Paris Hilton, THAT’S HOT!!), the Bible, makes no coherent case for that claim, any more than it makes a case for monogamy or fidelity.
Those who oppose same-sex relationships are largely making this up as they go along by citing anecdotal remarks from a few individuals whose works were published in that compilation of independent works known as the Bible. I’m not surprised to know that there were a few bigots back then, too. (And we must bear in mind that the Bible as we know it is a hammered out compromise document agreed upon by Roman Emperor Constantine and a motley crew of religious zealots in the early 300’s … at the Council of Nicaea. This most unholy compromise was largely contrived to accomplish two goals…sustain the Roman Empire and concentrate western power in Rome, AND to hedge Constantine’s bets as he faced his inevitable fate.)
Anyway, I digress. Van Houten is likely very correct about his predictions. At least I hope he is. Despite other recent SCOTUS activities related to severely restricting the ability to vote by Democrats who are also from racial/ethnic minorities – a purely political maneuver as opposed to a human-rights statement – our society continues to skid ever more rapidly down that slippery slope toward equality and civil liberties. Doesn’t that just piss you off??? How dare we???!!!
Mr. Van Houten, you are a seer. Perhaps we should burn you at a stake (or on a steak), because you obviously have superpowers of prediction imbued by Satan itself. I know…better yet, in the grand Christian tradition, let’s tie stones around your wrists, ankles and waistline and throw you into the river. If you drown, you’re innocent. If you survive, we’ll know you’re an emissary of Beelzebub himself. Either way, it will be an opportunity to gather the community for some good old-fashioned Christian fun.
Meanwhile, a note to Jess. The Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor. Not a lot different than the Germans of the day, but their leader didn’t have a Charlie Chaplin mustache. 🙂
Meanwhile, a note to Jess. The Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor. Not a lot different than the Germans of the day, but their leader didn’t have a Charlie Chaplin mustache.
I know that, I was riffing on John Belushi and his… was it over when… dialog from Animal House because it makes as much sense as DOMA being like it. Two days later and I am just now seeing this part. I really need to not smoke the weed when I come here.
“Prosecuted for preaching?” If that could happen, a lot of them would already be in prison. Pat Robertson is the first one that come to mind. After all, isn’t “hate speech” an indictable offense at least in some areas?
Was it over when Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell No. Fat drunk and stupid is obviously the way these GoOper idiots have decided to go through life. How sad to be so full of hate.
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x403sf_was-it-over-when-the-germans-bombed_fun#.Uc3Nyuc3tQA