How the Apostles Determined Koch Brothers Most Needy Of All

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Somewhere in The Acts of the Apostles one of the Apostles told people to put all they had into the kitty and it would be distributed to those according to need. For eons liberals and wrong minded fools have taken this to mean God is a communist. Nothing could be further from the truth. God loves capitalism. Why else do you think those that are best at it have it so well?

The apostles and the star of the show.  Pic courtesy www.italian-renaissance-art.com
The apostles and the star of the show. Pic courtesy www.italian-renaissance-art.com

What the quote really means is God wants tax cuts for the wealthiest so they can do even more good works. God understands doing good for the sake of doing good is a meaningless gesture. It’s important good works are advertised so people can learn from the good example.

For years Walmart spent more advertising it’s charitable works than it spent on charitable works. It was good for God and the people, and it made us feel less guilty for buying cheap goods from a company that sold cheap goods cause it paid cheap wages and bought cheap goods from companies that paid real cheap. As Sarah Palin once printed on her hand so she wouldn’t forget: “We need to lift the spirits of the American People.” Ironically on her other hand she had printed “Obama must read from a teleprompter.” We republicans still love Sarah.

So tax cuts for the wealthiest like my good friends the Koch Brothers are actually what God wants and the Bible tells us so. As further proof my good friend, radio talk show host Dave Ramsey, insists one can become a millionaire by 65 on minimum wage. All it calls for is living in a box one found in a dump and never owning anything.

Putting all the money you save by not having anything in sound investments will compound over time and provided you never get sick or suffer a catastrophe or get murdered by someone else living in a dump you will be a millionaire. This is obviously easy which points out the difficulty the Koch Brothers have being billionaires.

They already had lots of money so they have to work and live in mansions and bankroll tea party kooks and anyone else that hates President Obama or a graduated tax system. It’s hard work having all this stuff. Far better to be on minimum wage, which the Koch want lowered so life will be even easier for minimum wagers. The less money one has the fewer things to worry about. It’s for their own good.

Scott Walker is the Koch’s “chosen one.” He is doing a good job destroying unions in Wisconsin. It’s unfair to those that have to have to share with those whose work helped make their having possible. Wages need to be driven down. To compensate we republicans will of course reduce regulations on payday lenders so just as big banks can overextend, the peons of America can exercise their rights to overextend also. We just won’t be bailing them out because God wouldn’t like that since they borrowed at a higher percentage rate than Jesus said was fair. The Kochs never pay a higher rate than God demands.

You may ask just where is this “kitty”? It’s very simple. You can send your money to me C/O MadMike’s America. I will see it is invested wisely on things that will benefit me and by extension benefit America and help you go to Heaven. And isn’t that what we all want? A ticket to Heaven? Dig deep my friends. I’m looking at a house in Pastor Joel Osteen’s neighborhood.

About Post Author

Joe Hagstrom

Reformed Liberal now dedicated to saving world from Obamacare and Godless Atheists. Using MadMike's America to audition for high paying job with Fox News.
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Joe Hagstrom
8 years ago

I do owe a debt of gratitude to MadMike and the gang here. Alcohol, tobacco,disrespect for God and lust have made me a much more interesting person. Being a republican I am forgiven. The rest of you will burn in hell in the smoldering embers of Monica’s blue dress along with Bill Clinton while me, my buddies Mark Sanford and David Vitter feast with the Lord in Paradise.

Reply to  Joe Hagstrom
8 years ago

You’re welcome 🙂

jess
Reply to  Joe Hagstrom
8 years ago

That blue dress was ugly and anyone caught even looking at it, deserves to burn in the hell of their own making. Also, too you betcha… it’s like 20 years old man and it isn’t back in fashion yet. I’m proud to have helped making you a much more interesting person Joe but you’ll never be the most interesting man in the world. Yer welcome

Joe Hagstrom
8 years ago

I admit I got lucky Rachael cause MadMike did his job and caught my mixing up Scott Brown and Scott Walker, just as Rowdy caught my last post. Dan lefty know it all! I have a further explanation but I liked it so much I’m gonna make a post out of it and see if MadMike finds it worthy of publication.

Reply to  Joe Hagstrom
8 years ago

I can’t wait Joe 🙂

Marsha Woerner
Reply to  Joe Hagstrom
8 years ago

But really, Joe:
Scott Brown; Scott Walker – they’re both made of the same cloth. Certainly I can see the confusion! Fortunately, I don’t think that Scott Brown is thinking of getting into the pool for the presidential race. But I am waiting for a non-crazy on the Republican side to say anything. Of course, with the conflicts in that party, he/she wouldn’t have a chance!
Oh, and Joe, as regards “Using MadMike’s America to audition for high paying job with Fox News.”, no way. It definitely to well-connected and associated with the bleeding heart atheistic Communists over here. Sorry 🙂

Marsha Woerner
Reply to  Marsha Woerner
8 years ago

That sentence SHOULD read:
You’re definitely too well-connected and associated with the bleeding heart atheistic Communists over here. Sorry 🙂

You godless lover!

Reply to  Marsha Woerner
8 years ago

LOL! Yep!!

8 years ago

LOL Joe! Brilliant and just what I needed on this cold Sunday morning.

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