Republicans Save America and Have the Ads to Prove It
Read Time:2 Minute, 58 Second
The best thing about the election cycle is how every four years America gets reminded through our republican ads, debates and lectures just how evil liberals are. My good friend Marco Rubio consistently reminds how President Obama wants to change America and make us a third world country that replaces the stars and stripes on our flag with a hammer and sickle. An honest assessment if I ever heard one. Marco also said he fought the establishment and won. That the establishment has spent millions on this idiot is proof that what Marco said is true. The establishment was Marco’s bitch till recently.
My good friend and the guy I’ve given my support to, Donald Trump, has vowed to make America great again. Thousands of people show up at his rallies because they as I know this is the truth. Donald repeats over and over that he will stop illegal immigration. And Donald Trump would never repeat anything over and over if it weren’t true.
The most honest guy running though must be Ted Cruz. Ted’s ad said he fought for the Cross and won. President Obama hasn’t sent and Black Panthers to my house to take my Cross yet so that’s proof enough right there. I did have to go out and buy a few more guns though since the guns I had weren’t enough to protect my guns from Obama’s thugs and my Cross.
Ted’s ad said he fought for the Ten Commandments and won. I hadn’t heard they were under threat of being repealed but seeing as how they weren’t it’s more proof of Ted’s honesty and courage.
Ted fought for the Second Amendment and won. I hadn’t heard it was being repealed but it wasn’t so Ted wins again. And seeing as how President Obama has only signed since the last time I looked two bills regarding guns and one of them was to allow guns to be carried in national parks it’s more proof of the effectiveness and honesty of Ted Cruz. A powerful and courageous man indeed. I’ve always been thankful I bought a bottle of his elephant repellant. Haven’t had an elephant in my yard since. Not that they were a problem before but we’ve been warned about evil secular humanists running around corrupting children and burning flags and bibles and fortunately the elephant spray works on them also as I haven’t had and bible burning liberals sneaking into my yard either.
My favorite example of honesty is from a fellow republican named Bryce Benton who’s running for state senate in a neighboring Illinois district. Bryce was a state trooper that protected us from terrorist attacks according to his ad which ironically accused a fellow republican of being a shameful liar. Bryce must have done a good job as I can’t think of any terror attacks in Illinois lately. Too bad Bryce wasn’t around to stop terror attacks in California or Baghdad. But Bryce kept the good people of Illinois safe thank God, whom is real also because All the republicans mentioned in this post say so.
It will be morning in America again soon. Reaganomics will be given another generation to start working and Obamacare will be given a few more years not to work even though it’s working now but will not work and destroy America like Medicare and Social Security and unions will eventually because republicans said so. Trust me.
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Hey wait though, the guy that saved you from the terrorists in ILL. what about the Illinois Nazis, you know they are still around, even though Jake and Elwood got rid of them for a minute. I’m loving the ad the conservatives have put out just using Il Douche’s words as far as how he sees women. One thing that pisses me off with these ads though, shouldn’t be necessary to just make women an appendage of some dude, ie someone’s wife, mother sister etc. I am more than my husband’s ornament or at least I had better be or I will rid myself of him real quicklike and I wasn’t just my father’s property either. Feminazi rant done now. I just think you guys on the fright wing just need to keep on keeping on doing what you’re doing so I can see Hillz in the White House.
Hell they could dig up zombie Raygun up, re animate him and he still wouldn’t get the nomination, even as hateful as the old bastard was to certain segments of American society different from him and his now dead harpy wife. He’d be too liberal for these crackheads in the fright wing now.
You had me till you started talking foreign with the “Douche’s” thing Jess.
Sadly my good friend and terrorist fighter Bryce Benton lost to the other honest and forthright republican, Sam McCann last night. On the other hand it does reaffirm republican loyalty. No matter how big a scumbag one is, if he’s a republican it really doesn’t matter to us. This only applies to republican males though Jess. Misogyny must be maintained.
That’s what I’m going for. I had one pro life post picked up by some wacko site as a real thesis. Not that I want that argumentwith anyone. I leave it to MadMike to monitor hits and other stuff though. Once I send it off it becomes property of MMA.
Joe, You do realize there are wingnuts out there who will suck up every word here as gospel. Pretty funny though.