An Englishman Proclaims: ‘Trump Is Not My President’

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I can say that you know, Trump is not my president, as I’m English. Actually pretty much anyone who isn’t American can say “He’s not my President”. Come to think of it so can Americans at the moment as he isn’t until he’s formally invested or whatever it is you do to a new one. Of course, it may be entirely possible that he will never be your President.

You see, according to various sources he may be impeached for something – tax avoidance? I have no idea. Anyway, something may happen before he is invested or whatever you do to new Presidents. We, outside of the USA, can only wait with bated breath to see what happens.

In an attempt to try and understand just what has happened up to now, I called a good pal in America and interviewed her in order to write this article. I was hoping to find some sort of understanding that I could pass onto any Brits who, like myself, are somewhat bewildered by this ‘Trump thing’ – for want of a better description.

The interview via telephone went as follows. (I know it did because I recorded it).

“Hi ****, it’s Bammy from England!”

“Hi Bammy! How are you?”

“I’m fine. Look. I want to interview you about Trump. I’m recording it so I get it right. Then I’m going to send an article to Mad Mike’s America. You ok with that?”

“Sure! Go ahead!”

“Right. Question one. How did Trump win when he got fewer votes than Clinton?”

“Oh that’s our electoral college. They voted him in”

“Ok. Now if Clinton got more votes than Trump how is it democratic that this electoral college seemingly ignored the people and voted Trump in?”

“Oh well, it’s the way it works over here”

“What works? American democracy?”

“Yeah! Democracy works that way over here”

“How is it democracy when the candidate with the most votes, by some margin I believe, loses?”

“It’s the electoral college that decides!”

“What is the electoral college?”

“Gee, I dunno really. It’s the place where they decide who the President is gonna be”

“So the people don’t decide?”

“Well, yeah, sort of but the electoral college sort of decide too”

“Have you any idea what you are talking about?”

At this point there were a few slightly nervous giggles.

“You have absolutely no idea do you?”

“Well, kinda. The electoral college decides after the people have voted”

“So. The people vote for who they want to be President. Then the electoral college basically can stick two fingers up to much of America and say ‘Tough! You’re getting this guy and not he guy you want’?”

“Er – I guess so”

“Now, tell me, would you say America’s democratic system is completely undemocratic and more worthy of a banana republic?”

“Is this going on the internet?”

“Yes. Well it is if Mad Mikes America publish it”

“Will my name be used?”

“Not if you don’t want it to be”

“Ok. I don’t want my name on it”

“Fair enough. Now, is America a democracy or a banana republic given it’s current supposedly democratic system?”

“What’s a banana republic?”

“A place where dictators run the show generally”

“I guess it’s that then”

“So you think your country is a banana republic run by a dictator?”

“Kinda. I think it’s run by lots of dictators”

“What? You can only have one dictator! That’s how it works!”

“Not over here Bammy. Over here we’ve lots of them. Trump’s just the one in charge right now”

“Ok. Thanks for talking to me – and I promise I won’t use your name or where your from even”

“I’m from Michigan”

“I know that!”

“Oh – yeah!”

“Final question. Do you think Trump will be a good President?”

“No. We never have a good President”

“Thanks babe. Talk soon”

So, America, don’t ask me. I have no idea. Mind you, from what I just heard I suspect there’s quite a few Americans that have no idea either.

Far be it from little old me to offer advice to the most powerful country on the planet but, I really do think you need to sort out your democratic system a wee bit and, who knows? Once you have you could even actually be a democracy.

Just a thought.

I have so few please treat it gently eh?

Good luck. Methinks you are definitely going to need it!!

About Post Author

Neil Bamforth

I am English first, British second and never ever European. I have supported Oldham Athletic FC for 50 years which has made me immune from depression. My taste buds have died due to too many red hot curries so I drink Kronenburg beer and milk - sometimes in the same glass. I have a wife, daughter, 9 cats and I like toast.
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7 years ago

Your American friend is apparently clueless about the electoral college. She is also clueless in making the statement that none of our presidents have been any good. Sorry there Neil. Find an American friend who is knowledgeable. After all if you’re going to spend the money to call the US you should call someone who knows what they’re talking about.

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