A Mother’s Pain: A Letter From Donald Trump’s Mom

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by David P. Greenberg

The following is a letter from Donald Trump’s mom to Americans:

Fred and I both are so sorry that our boy tried to take over your little country. We tried everything with him, but things just seemed to get worse and worse. And, of course, Fred never really understood the boy.

I remember when he came home with his first “B.” He was 13. He tried telling us that “B” stood for “Best.” Maybe we shouldn’t have humored him. He was just always so sensitive.
This nice young man named BitcoDavid has offered to help us bring him back home – where he belongs. Such a strong name, BitcoDavid. German? I wonder. I’m sure he’s a good Republican, and his bubbie loves him as much as I love little Donnie. He created this page, on the Bookface, and asked me to write this little note. Oh, I’m sorry. The Facesbook.
From what I gather about the Internet’s thingie, he can… oh dear… tie in? Well, no matter. He can connect it to the Tweeter, so Donnie can see it. BitcoDavid has told me that the more people contribute to this page, the more Twits Donnie will get. That boy never was much of a reader, and we’re so proud to know that he’s reading all his Twits.
Please try to understand that Donnie was never a bad boy. He just fell in with the wrong crowd. You know how that can be. He was such a misfit in school. In the 12th grade, he would come home, crying, every day. Then he met that Kellyanne woman. That’s when everything went south – if you’ll pardon the expression. But we haven’t been able to keep a handle on him since then.
Thank you for patiently reading the writings of an old woman who’s tried everything in her power to raise a strong and straight young man, and sadly, failed so miserably. Please help me bring Donnie back home, where we can try and set things right.
Please share this everywhere.  People need to know that The Donald’s mom really did try.

About Post Author

David P. Greenberg

An active Food Christian, a fighter and a renegade author, I've worked everywhere and done everything. In 2006 I was diagnosed with type II Diabetes. I created a diet and exercise program, and am now, free of the disease. It is my hope to be able to help others achieve the same.
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Polly
7 years ago

What’s a “Bitco?”

Reply to  Polly
7 years ago

It’s 1/2 of my name, BitcoDavid. It’s a very long story, and probably quite boring.

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