Hey Christians! How Did That Whole ‘Rapture Day’ Thing Go For You?
Happy “Rapture” day, sinners. I for one am completely disappointed that the Rapture was a bust. I’ve been waiting for the day all the Christians leave.
Trump, Kim, North Korea, and That Elusive Nobel Prize
by David P. Greenberg Apparently, Kim Jong Un has agreed to self-impose some meaningless little sanction, awaiting Trump's Nobel Prize-worthy summit. Don't ask me what...
Trump Is Our National Mistake So Democrats Unite Or Cede America To Republicans
I don’t care that Trump bombed Syria. Some would argue that it was the right and necessary thing to do. Many would say, “I despise Trump, but he did the right thing this time.”
Mission Accomplished? Commander Cuckoo’s Real Motivation For Bombing Syria
On Friday night, Trump bombed Syria. So, today, he’s all like, “Mission accomplished.” and “It was the best bombing in the history of the world. Nobody’s ever seen bombing like this before. Blee-me.”
Trump the Liar Is Trump the Crook
Look at this shit. This makes less sense than Ted Kaczynski’s chicken-scratch “Manifesto.” The more time I spend on Trump’s page, the more I become convinced he’s a Paranoid Psychotic. Trump should be pushing a shopping cart and talking to lampposts.
Does Anybody Remember Woodstock?
The Summer of Love? Communes? We brought Marijuana into the mainstream. We legalized and protected a woman’s right to choose. We almost – for a heartbeat, anyway – did away with the Death Penalty. We invented wind and solar power. We created the EPA and actually cleaned up the planet.
Afghanistan, Just One Example Of America’s Failed Leadership
Republicans think Reagan dismantled the Soviet Union. But he didn’t. Afghanistan did. We just sat back and let them go broke, fighting an unwinnable war. How long have we been in Afghanistan?
What Donald Trump and OJ Have In Common
Remember back when OJ did it? Yeah, he was acquitted, but never really exonerated. Why? He did it. Everybody knows that. I myself always liked OJ. Dude could play a hella game of football, and he was funny as fuck. He was in all those Zucker Brothers movies. He was funny as fuck.
America Is Officially a Nation of Hate and a Hated Nation
But, do we hate our own children now? Is that who we are? I don’t know how the Right can justify insulting, berating, and ethnic-and-gender baiting, these kids. I wouldn’t expect you to just come out and say, “I’ve been wrong-headed about this issue my whole life.” But to viciously attack young people…
Tillerson No Longer President Psychopath’s Chief Buttboy
Hey, Tillerson. What did you get for a severance package? Thoughts and fuckin’ prayers? Bwaaaahahahahahahahaha! Shouldn’t have said bad shit about Putin. Just consider yourself lucky Trump didn’t have you painted orange.
Trump Tells Kim Jong Un How To Behave And Even the Norwegians Start Laughing
OK, so here’s the drill. Kim Jong Un and S. Korean President Moon have agreed to talks. Trump wanted to bully his way into the thing, but both leaders told him to go pound sand. The latter replied with, “If we wanted clowns, we’d hire Ringling.” And Kim just said, “Go fuck yourself.”
First We Arm the Teachers…
Some people are just really fuckin’ smart. I pretty much had this “Guns for Teachers©” thing figured out, when last night, somebody mentioned – in one sentence – something that chilled me to the bone. Something simple, that I wished I had thought of.
Why Donald Trump Might Have Tennis Elbow
So, Robo-Barbie and part-time security risk, Ivanka is going to South Korea to “brief” President Moon Jae-in on the sanctions. She plans to get off her chartered flight and go straight to her hotel to freshen up, first. She’ll stare into her mirror and repeat, “I am a real girl. I AM. I AM a real girl.”
Stop the Epidemic, Get Rid of the Guns
The guy who did the Las Vegas massacre wasn’t 18. Pulse Night Club wasn’t a school. Nikolas Cruz isn’t the only mass-shooter, and for Christ’s fuckin’ sake, THIS ISN’T THE FIRST TIME THIS HAS HAPPENED! Today! Today, fuckin’ Rubio wakes up, screws on his “commitment” face, and tells us “what’s being done.”