MadMike’s America Will Listen to Jesus!

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With football season just around the corner I figured this was a good time to stir up the goddamn atheists that infest this place.

I was reading my good friend Grunge Gene’s blog, Dissaffected and it Feels So Good, and the power of Jesus’s name overwhelmed me.

I don’t know when or if He’s coming back. Seeing how screwed up everything is He will probably tell His Dad to take care of it and go play golf with Moses instead.

Right wing kooks invoke Jesus all the time. They support killing and bombing and deregulating and tax cuts for the rich in His name.

The atheist Lefties get upset at us Christians and call us superstitious fools and the like.

The fact is everyone listens to Jesus. Not that it’s Jesus saying all this crap that kooks say he said. But being the attention hound I am, I am thinking of changing my blog moniker from “Truth 101” to “Jesus 101.” And instead of “Joe the Sports Guy” at MMA, “Jesus the Sports Guy” at MMA.

The question now is will you sinners accept Jesus 101?

Jesus’ preseason pick for the Super Bowl is the Packers and Steelers.

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About Post Author

Joe Hagstrom

Reformed Liberal now dedicated to saving world from Obamacare and Godless Atheists. Using MadMike's America to audition for high paying job with Fox News.
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Joe (Jesus) Hagstrom
13 years ago

Forgot my fucking password! Jesus Christ!

God hasn’t been a Notre Dame fan since he got the ref to make that bad call on Rahib “Rocket” Ismael’s touchdown return that would have won them a national championship. Only good Christian sounding named people are favored by God. Lou Holtz forgot that.

Oso: I really meant “Jesus. Did you see the gazongas on that chick!?!”

13 years ago

Hmmm, wait a minute… I thought Jesus was speaking today in D.C…. oh, wait a minute, that’s Glenn Beck!! Sorry, my bad! 😎

13 years ago

Jesus is into hunchbacks?…oh dear…there goes Oldham’s promotion….;-)

13 years ago

Hey Joe – Everyone knows that Jesus is not an NFL guy, he’s into College Football big time and his team is of course, Notre Dame.

13 years ago

If HE can ensure Oldham Athletic Football Club get promoted from Division 1 to The Championship this season he can talk to me anytime.

(Incidentally…that’s football I’m talking about, not that strange game you have over there)…;-)

13 years ago

How about just good ol’ Jesus H. Christ?

osori
13 years ago

Just got a new Raider hat Joe. As the other Christian dude on the site I say Steelers – Vikes. Got to clarify if you mean Jesus the carpenter and prophet or Jesus the phone guy from East LA?

Jess
13 years ago

If you go with Jesus 101 there will be more right wingers over there and the possibility of really bad conversation. I don’t follow football at all so I’ll say ok that will work.

Reply to  Jess
13 years ago

LOL Jess 🙂

Admin
13 years ago

I am afraid that Jesus101 may not do well Joe 🙂 🙂 Of course if he were really Jesus……After all Mother Hen spotted my crucifix but that is a long story and in no way diminishes my atheism 🙂

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