Farewell (probably) for a month
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I’ve been posting on MMA for about a month, since Mike invited me to contribute, and it’s been a very pleasant experience. Considerate, insightful comments, great posts to read and Mike keeping a watchful eye on liitle (and large) mistakes.
But, I’m of to the UK for a month to see friends, family and lots and lots of snow. My daughter (who lives near St. Andrews) has an old laptop, so I might be granted some access, but her boradband is sometimes a bit shaky, so I don’t know if I’ll be able to post often, if at all.
Don’t worry, I’ll be back.
One thing I’ve noticed is the changes I’ve had to make to my posts to comply with American English. I don’t mind, as I’m posting on a mainly American read site, but I hope that all you lovely folks in the US of A relaise that not everyone in the world speaks Merikan.
We’re seeing more and more citizens of your great country coming down here to NZ to enjoy our December summer, and many actually stay on. Few god-botherers, no Republicans OR Democrats, no Tea-Partys, great ice cream, fantastastic hunting and fishing, top tax of 40%, wide open spaces, long hot summers from November to April and best of all, very low population, so no crowding.
To help our American visitors, I’ve made up a little introductory language comparator.
|
Kiwi |
English |
| Arvo | Afternoon; “See you this arvo Bill” |
|
Bach (Crib in South Island) |
Holiday home, usually with basic facilities….like a long drop. |
| Barbie | Barbecue; “Come on round, we’re having a barbie” |
| Barista | In a coffee house, one who makes and serves coffee-based espresso drinks (Fancy name for a coffee making waiter) |
|
Bloke |
Man, stranger; “He’s a good bloke” |
|
Boatie |
A boating enthusiast, also Yachtie. Kiwis love to use contractions, and will manufacture one if one is not available already. I’m sure we will soon see: Phonie (mobile phone aficionado), Deckie (one who is continually talking about or extending the already huge decks around his house), Bookie (a Kiwi who actually reads books!!) ..no just joking. Actually Kiwis are great book readers, book swappers and borrowers. |
|
Box of fluffies (fluffy ducks) |
Feeling cheerful and happy, (Normally said in response to an enquiry regarding personal condition) “How ya doin,? ” “Box of fluffies, mate” |
|
Bugger |
Bit difficult this one. Not usually used in polite conversation in the UK or USA, but occurs many times in NZ. Easiest to define using examples: “It’s a bit of a bugger” |
|
Chilly Bin |
Cool Box (Insulated plastic box with handle, used for storage and cooling (with ice) of various beverages, traditionally beer) |
|
Chook |
Chicken (as in Hen) |
| Cockie | Farmer. Can be modified by type; Sheep cockie, Cow cockie, Mad cockie etc. |
|
Crook |
Unwell, as in “I’m a bit crook” Can be used in traditional English usage for law breaker, but Crim or Hoon mostly used. |
| Custard | Usualy a cornflour or egg based dessert, but used to indicate that events or plans are not turning out well; “If it rains, the sports day is going to turn to custard” |
|
Dag Dags |
A hard case, a joker |
|
Dairy |
Local general shop |
| Dob | To inform on, to clype; “He dobbed in his mates to the cops” |
|
Dunny |
Toilet and/or bathroom |
|
Eh |
Commonly used as a suffix on most sentences; “Nice day eh?” |
| Farewell |
To say goodbye. “The school farewelled Peter after 30 years of service” |
| Football | MAJOR DIFFERENCE Football here refers to RUGBY(the one with 15 in a team and an ovoid ball.; Soccer is the game played with the round ball; “Great football last night, ‘Canes got three tries” (NOTE: Amercan Football is seen as an effete abomination. Padding? Helmets?) |
| G’day |
Hello, good-day, polite greeting; “G’day, howz it goin?” Note This greeting is used all over NZ and Oz, but it sounds different in both countries. It is not pronounced exactly as you would imagine, with subtle differences in emphasis. Immigrants should not use it for at least 5 years, otherwise you’ll sound a right wally. |
|
Gumboot, Gummies |
Wellington boots. Can be worn on any social occasion, up to and including meeting the Prime Minister and/or Governor General. It is considered good etiquette to wash them before formal occasions. |
| Handle | Name used for a ‘pint’ glass mug, used in pubs. ; “Handle of Speights dark please mate” |
|
Hard yakka |
Hard work; “You’ll have to do the hard yakka to succeed” |
| Hissy Fit | Throwing a tantrum for no real reason; “Jenny had a hissy fit when she couldn’t get a chocolate” |
|
Hokey Pokey |
Foamed sugar lolly (Like a non-chocolate coated Crunchie), also an ice cream flavour |
| Hoon | Youngster with probably criminal tendencies, a ned.; “Bunch of hoons have just tagged the school” |
| Hottie | Hot water bottle |
| Iceblock | Ice lolly, popsicle, frozen fruit flavoured juice. |
| Identity | The condition of being oneself or itself, and not another, or a local character.;”The Petone RSA farewelled John Brown, a local identity” |
|
Jaffa Jafa |
A type of chocolate coated, orange-flavoured lolly |
|
Jandals |
Plastic sandals, using a thong to secure the toes (Deriv. From Japanese Sandals) |
|
Kumara |
A sweet potato, a staple of most traditional Maori and Polynesian diets. Used throughout all cultures in NZ |
|
Lollies |
Sweets,candies, not just lollipops |
|
Long Drop |
Extremely primitive dunny…no running water, just dropping ….I’ll leave it to your imagination. |
| Mad as a Meat Axe | Completely lost the plot, completely crazy; “He’s as mad as a meat axe, he supports the Aussies at football” |
| Manchester | A major Northern English City, in NZ, a general term for any cotton ware or bedlinen;”Go to the Manchester department to buy some towels.” |
| Mole | In the UK a furry subterranean mammal, in NZ, a lady of possibly negotiable virtue. |
| Munted | Broken, busted, kaput.; “After the crash, the ute was totally munted” |
| Number 8 wire | Kiwis,being used to living in a lonely and isolated part of the world, have become past masters of the bodge improvisation job. “If it’s broke, fix it.” (normally with a twisted bit of steel wire (of 8 gauge)used to make fences (for sheep, see Ovis aries below) Sometimes (even though rarely) the fix doesn’t work.. See “Bugger” and “She’ll be right” |
| Offsider | Assistant, friend; “We saw him and his offsider going down the road” |
|
Pack a sad |
Unhappy, moody ;”It felt like all of New Zealand packed a sad after the result in Cardiff in the 2007 Rugby World Cup” |
| Pakeha | Non-Maori and non-Polynesian inhabitant of New Zealand. Has a slightly older connotation of; a white (European heritage) New Zealander |
| Pav | Pavlova, the iconic Kiwi dessert. A meringue base, covered with cream and fruit. |
| Pikelet | Small pancake (drop-scone in Scotland), Usually served with butter, jam or cream |
| Poke | MAJOR DIFFERENCE. In UK, poke can mean being prodded by a finger or object, or in Scotland, a paper cone for holding sweets or chips. In NZ used as an impolite euphemism for f**k, (the act of sexual congress) NOTE the absurd saying “Better than a poke in the eye with a blunt stick” works in both UK and NZ. |
| Pokie | Nothing to to with Poke above, a one-armed bandit or electronic gambling machine. |
| Rattle your dags | Hurry up, go faster. (*See dags above) |
| Rellies | Relatives.”We’ve got to clean up, my rellies will be here in an hour” |
| Reticulated | No it’s not some form of reptile or arthropod, it means piped in; “He’s got reticulated gas to the house, no need to buy bottled gas” |
| RSA | The Royal New Zealand Returned and Services’ Association; a veterans club, running many local clubs throughout NZ |
|
Ovis aries. There are many, many sheep in NZ. No jokes….or else. |
|
| She’ll be right | Contrary to all the laws of probability (and possibly all the rules of the Universe) everything’s going to work out OK (*See Bugger above) |
| Shout | Either to raise one’s voice to be heard in the distance, or to treat, to buy something for someone”; “Come in to the bar, and I’ll shout you a beer” |
| Sickie | To take a day of work or school, a sick day. NOTE; Can sometimes give the impression of pretending to be sick to get off work. |
| Sleepout | A room or small suite of rooms founds somewhere on the property, but usually attached to or above the garage, with basic amenities for overnight guests. Can vary between a camp-bed and a bucket, to almost hotel-level accommodation. |
| Smoko | Smoke break, work break. |
| Spit the dummy | Throw a tantrum; loose the plot. ; “Jim spat the dummy when the boss refused to use Jim’s plan” (*See Hissy Fit) |
| Stoked | Excited, really pleased; “Jim was stoked when he won the Lotto” |
| Stubbies | Two completely separate meanings.Either small bottles of beer, or a very short pair of shorts worn by blokes (popular in the 70s) |
| Stuffed | Broken not working, f – – ked.; “That starter on the ute is stuffed” |
|
Suck the Kumera |
To die, to have carked it. |
| Sunnies | Sun glasses |
|
Sweet as |
No, the Kiwi saying this hasn’t forgotten the last word. This is used as a complete phrase, indicating admiration and/or awe; “Mate, that Ute’s sweet as” |
| Tag | Graffiti ; “Those kids from South Auckland tagged the dairy” |
| Tramping | Hiking |
| Twink | Now generic name for any white-out correcting fluid, like Tippex in the UK. |
| Wag | To absent oneself from school, to truant, to dog; “The boy wagged from his Science class” |
|
Ute |
Utility vehicle, a pick-up truck, but often modified and customised by boy racers, and adults who should really know better racers. |
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I am so glad you will be/are visiting London, Robert. Best to you and yours… and Happy Boxing Day… I’m with you about WiFi, so I’ll just look forward to your safe return to NZ and more words of wisdom.
Thanks for all your good wishes (well done Holte, not many would be able to use Hogmanay)
Thanks Mike, I know broadband is pretty good in the UK, but I’m not sure if I can get to uses my daughter’s laptop (it’s so old, I think it uses clockwork) and I really don’t like using internet cafe computers, they are just too unsecure.
Merry Hogmanay.
Safe travels.
Bon voyage old bean! Be encouraged by the way as the UK has some of the fastest and most readily available broadband in the world.
Safe travels and have a great vacation.
Well I will miss you! I love language, and accents and basically anything foreign. With the political climate here being what it is, if I thought they’d take me in NZ I’d move.
Enjoy your vacation!