Words Facebook refuses to recognize


Courtesy of schnicka.com

As a writer, I love to use the English language, and often, I use it well. Okay, most of the time. Sundays? Shut up. However, over the past year, I have merged and melded words that Facebook refuses to acknowledge as words.

I have also used other people’s merged and melded words, and Facebook hates them as well. Then there are just regular old words, all despised by the Book of Face. Which is funny since Microsoft Word doesn’t recognize Facebook as a word. Ha.

Here are new words that Facebook needs to immediately STOP spell checking with that stupid red line.

1) Asshat. It’s a perfect representation of someone who is so ignorant and so insanely closed minded that they wear their ass as a hat.

2) Douchemonkey. No, I have no flipping idea what this means, but it looks great after Rick Perry’s name. It could be represented with a photo of a baboon holding a box of Summer’s Eve, smiling.

3) TeaPublican. DUH. I mean, come on. It’s obvious.

4) McSticky Pants. I use this in combination with the word, Frothy: Frothy McSticky Pants. It’s what I often call Rick Santorum.

5) Teahadist. I didn’t coin this, but I love it. It represents the fundamental Christians who scream about Muslims while encouraging a holy war of their own. I love this word. Did I mention that I love this word?

6) Fundies. Shorter version of fundamentalists. For times you really don’t want to type all those letters.

7) Dominionist. NO ONE recognizes this word, and it’s starting to piss me off. Facebook redlines it, Microsoft Word redlines it, Word Press redline it. This makes it much harder for writers to draw attention to the dangers of Dominionism when people keep saying “Dude, you know that’s not a word right?”

8) Shitforbrains. Yes, it’s one word. It’s Newt Gingrich’s middle name. Newt “Shitforbrains” Gingrich. If you split it up, it looks silly. As opposed to how it looks oh never mind.

9) Fuckall. I know, it’s foul and nasty and…um…foul, but when all else fails, and I’ve had it up to HERE arguing with some TeaPublican Dominionist asshat, it’s how I end the conversation.

10) Paulbot. Look, we’ve all got at least one, right? A Ron Paul supporter who thinks it’s “rad” that Paul wants to legalize pot, end wars and destroy the Federal Reserve. Bitchin. And no matter what you say, that person stares at you with glassy, red eyes and mutters that you’re the problem and please put that piece of foil back on the window, thanks. Paulbot.

I plan to create a petition to force Facebook to recognize these words, as soon as I figure out how to get Microsoft Word to recognize Facebook. I hate all these red lines-they make me nervous.

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Copyright 2012 MadMikesAmerica
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Posted by on January 27, 2012. Filed under COMMENTARY/OPINION. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. Both comments and pings are currently closed.
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5 Responses to Words Facebook refuses to recognize

  1. Anonymous

    January 27, 2012 at 10:57 am

    I think “fuckall” is widely used in the UK but not so much here. Facebook needs to be a little more international 🙂

    • Erin N.

      January 27, 2012 at 11:07 am

      Thank you! Facebook needs to be A LOT of things, one of which is obviously much more informed about cat orgies.

  2. greenlight

    January 27, 2012 at 11:18 am

    The other night, my iPhone kept auto-correcting “tea-baggers” to “tea-naggers,” and “repubs” (i.e. republicans) to “repugnant.” Quite amusing, really. 🙂

  3. RickRay

    January 27, 2012 at 11:44 am

    Try adding the words: creatard, and godlodyte. Shit! Redlined again.

  4. Rue

    January 27, 2012 at 11:06 pm

    I think my favorite is Dominionist <—that squiggly red line is bugging me, by the way.