LGBT Rights Are More Than A Single Issue
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I’m often asked by my republican friends (both gay and straight) why I am such a single issue voter for gay rights. While I may discuss LGBT rights I do look at all aspects and generally agree with most of the views held by my candidate. However I admit I’m a tad insulted that marriage equality, LGBT rights, whatever you want to call it, is being simplified to a “single issue”. Let me explain how exactly this “single” issue affects me and every other LGBT person.
Health Insurance:
One of the largest misconceptions is that the LGBT has access to mutual partner benefits, that even though its provided as a separate service from “true” spousal benefits that it falls under the separate but equal bracket.
The truth of the matter is it doesn’t. One of the largest benefits to health insurance is the tax break. Insurance is a pre-tax cost, meaning much like a 401k it’s taken out before taxes are assessed which has great potential of lowering your tax bracket and therefore saving couples some serious cash. The kicker is if an LGBT couple gets insurance they are no longer eligible for the pre-tax deduction meaning the savings on income is not received. The affect of this can cost thousands of dollars a year for LGBT couples.
Studies have shown overwhelmingly that insured individuals live longer and healthier lives, meaning less “moochers” on the system. It only makes sense to provide affordable health care to as many people as possible, allowing the same benefits to promote healthy living.
Child Adoption:
This is a hard topic to cover since the laws can be very different from state to state. The long and short of it is this: There are thousands of couples who currently are raising a child. These couples have elected to bring a child into this world; they cannot have an accidental birth. These families plan, organize, save up and work very hard to adopt yet in many states both parents cannot adopt the child. If the adoptive parent should die, the remaining parent has no legal right to the child they have raised; to the child that only knows them as mom or dad. When there are thousands of children who need homes why would anyone deny them a stable and loving environment?
Visitation Rights:
Simply put we have no promises. Imagine your husband or wife falls ill or worse still, is on their death bed and imagine being told you cannot visit them. This is the reality for LGBT community members, without the protections of a marriage LGBT couples have zero rights when it comes to the hospital and visitation of their loved one.
For LGBT soldiers serving this country, if deployed overseas and their spouse dies, they would have zero guarantees that they could come home to settle affairs, let alone even bury their spouse. On the reverse end an LGBT army spouse may not even be informed that their spouse was killed. This leaves them vulnerable to finding out about their spouse’s death in a very public way. In the end should two people who have cared for each other be blocked from offering support in vulnerable moments, or even worse the final moments?
Job Security:
This is one of the simplest because right now, depending on where you live, you can be fired for being gay, and I have the misfortune to live in one of those fire at will states.
Peace of Mind:
One of the greatest protections marriages provide is the ability to know your family will be taken care of. The reason civil marriage was created by the govt. was to allow for families to protect their property and ensure it’s secured by heirs. Legal documents no matter how great your lawyer do not compare to rightful ownership of surviving family. This is the reason pre-nuptials are created, marriage itself is so binding that it has to be declared otherwise.
You do not have to agree with someone’s definition of family to understand the need to protect your loved ones. All you need to do is imagine for one moment knowing that everything you worked for, all the protections you put in place to ensure the well being of your family will be taken by those it for which in wasn’t intended.
The Moral of the Story:
The list above is but the smallest cross section that is marriage equality. There are over a thousand more benefits, rights and privileges that our straight allies don’t realize. When women fought to vote, when interracial couples fought for their marriage equality these were not single issues, these were movements given a simple name that held very complex consequences.
People who assume the LGBT trivializes the selection of a candidate by discussing these rights have zero insight and are insulting at the very least. What is being trivialized is my life; I will never have control over the taxes I pay, how much my insurance will cost, whether the CEO of my company will pay a smaller percentage, how much I will pay at the pump, or if we decide to go to war as a country. In the end though the one thing I refuse to let the government control is whether or not my spouse is protected, that my child is safe and that if I pass before them, I can be sure they are taken care of.
Our family is the most important thing we know, take any family right now and tell them that every family safety net they know is up for grabs. Parental rights, inheritance, health insurance, property, visitation rights, put all those on the table for any family today, and then ask what they think of tax rates, and war. The fear and reality of a family in jeopardy will override all else and those families would move earth and moon to protect their families, just as I would I can promise that. This is not a single issue vote, it is a number of significant issues that will determine the IMMEDIATE safety of my family and therefore it needs my immediate and undivided attention.
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I’m not sure what the point was of ever bringing up women’s rights and trying to place one higher than the other? In my humble and young opinion just because by law you can say women have 100% of rights does not make it so. Every civil rights movement will need to continue to look out for and protect their newly afforded rights because there will be those who try and abuse and discriminate against you.
Women are being paid less, they are being told what to do and what can be covered with their bodies while men can cover Viagra under their insurance. African Americans are still being jailed at a higher rate than Caucasians even though statistics show drug use is higher among white affluent Americans. And god (or whomever you believe in) willing LGBT’s will still be fighting long after afforded rights. Discrimination does not stop just because change has been made, there will always be a faction of individuals trying to bring their small minded views back into reality. It’s for that reason that I think civil rights movements will never truly end for generations if at all.
There is no need to create more divides; I don’t know the whole history of the women’s liberation and its cooperation or lack of with LGBT when it comes to our past. I know however that now I have been reached out to by many Women who are heterosexual and fighting for equal pay and reproductive rights and want to fight with the LGBT for our rights MANY HUNDREDS in fact. The only way we are ever going to move forward is if we stop looking back; stop bitching about the past and start celebrating the potential of our future.
2004 was not long ago but if I wanted to find an excuse to give up I could look back to then and see how we lost nearly half the country to popular vote. Instead I look to the future and realize rather than divide people or write them off I need to have conversations with them and try to change hearts. Half these people are sheltered and clueless, they have been brainwashed. Wil K. if you spent half as much time focusing on civil conversations about how you’re affected verse trying to tell people why you’re rights are more real than theirs, you’d be changing minds and hearts. Instead of lashing out the LGBT needs to have conversations, be civil and show they have the cooler heads.
Don’t be idiots. The Bible is clear: Men FUCKING men is an obamination from the depths of hell and anyonen who does it should be cast out. You can all talk your liberal BS but you should know that us republicans know the Bible and the Word of God and we will live long after you have been cast out. Fuck all faggots to the hershey hwy.
FYI, the babble is a collection of myths and lies. Anyone that believes that bullshit is a self-deluded fool.
You are a bigoted, willfully ignorant fool if you think the Rethugnicans are anything more than a hypocritical group of anti-American crooks. They are playing to you religious reich jerks so keep you paying and supporting them while they oppress you and everyone else.
I can prove it all and you can prove nothing. Wanna go a few rounds of providing proof? I’m ready. here’s a start:
As stated by Dr. Bart Ehrman, Professor of religious studies at the University of North Caroline, Chapel Hill, NC said, “In the entire first Christian century, Jesus is not mentioned by a single Greek or Roman scholar, politician, philosopher, or poet. His name never appears in a single inscription, and it is never found in a single piece of private correspondence. Zero! Zip references!”
A Few Noticeable Events in the Life of Jesus
Herod’s slaughter of all the baby boys in Bethlehem.
Jesus’ triumphant entry in jerusalem, where the entire town welcomes him as their king.
Jesus casting out the greedy moneychangers. (in an area about the size of 34 football fields)
Two earthquakes his Jerusalem.
Supernatural darkness covers “all the land” for hours.
The Sacred Temple curtain tears from top to bottom.
All the dead holy men in the cemetery come out of their graves and wander Jerusalem, “appearing to many.”
And yet, contemporary historians in the time of Jesus didn’t write about any of this.
So is eating shellfish, cutting your hair, having a woman in the house during her period and working on the Sabbath which is Saturday not Sunday. Pigs are unclean, so hopefully you haven’t had any pork ever. Here’s a CLUE-Jesus destroyed the old temple, or the old covenant, which means that all those laws in Leviticus and Deuteronomy are wiped away for Christians. “You Republicans” are bigoted ignoramuses who would crucify the actual Jesus all over again and wouldn’t know the bible if I hit you in the groin with it. “You Republicans” make sane Americans sick.
Oh Erin, please stop beating around the bush (no not that Bush) and say what you mean. 😀
While I do agree with everything you say, don’t you think it is a bit unfair to always use facts? You could just use slogan’s empty rhetoric and wishful thinking. Then it would level the playing field between us and the Rethugnicans.
I apologize. White Jesus is bestest cuz he wants me to have a gun and stuff and he’s for supply side economics! (Better?) 😀
That’s more like it! No taking unfair advantage by using those nasty old facts and rational thinking.
I could bet any amount of money that this atheist, knows way more about your holy book than you do. Wanna put it to a test, let the readers decide there jinkie? Nowhere in the bible is homosexuality spoken about as an abomination. do you go out and about on Saturdays or Sundays, whichever day the sabbath is in your house, which is a whole other topic, y’all can’t decide what day to have the rejoicifying fer the lawd going on. Anyway, I digress, so where was I, oh yeah do you go out on your sabbath and shoot people down if they are mowing the lawn, that’s work you know. Do you offer up yer virgins for sacrifice if they back talk you if you are a parent, oh wait that’s kids not virgins, I was getting all the fairy tale mixed up, like you tamborine bangers for Jesus do. I could go on and on but I think you know the drill.
I think he misspelled his ID. Maybe it should be “kinkie69” although that would still be poor spelling. Who would have thought putting the “J” and “K” next to each other would be a problem?
We’ll see if he accepts my challenge. I have lots more ready when he is.
From the CDC:
Among victims of intimate partner violence, about 1 in 4 women (24.3%) and 1 in 7 men (13.8%) have experienced severe physical violence by an intimate partner (e.g., hit with a fist or something hard, beaten, slammed against something) at some point in their lifetime.
Josh’s article, by the way, is fantastic and I hope when people vote, they realize that Romney and Ryan will never stop defending DOMA, may reinstate DADT and will set LGBT rights back decades.
Aw Erin, look at you being all facty and stuff with facty things from the CDC that an investigator person might have been able to do had they the ninja google skills 🙂
You are giving the GoOpers too much credit here. I am thinking centuries is where they will be taking us back to. They have already spent 1.5 million of tax payer money to defend DOMA and it has been knocked down by more than one court as unconstitutional. I’ve been calling for The Four 2012 and donating my money to help with that fight.
I said you are a liar. You read things to be the way you want them to be. As my father taught me, “Figures don’t lie, but liars can figure.” You have not presented creditable evidence for one thing you have said. Not your personal credential nor any “statistics” you claim. You have been called on those things several times and all you do is whine about it.
I increasingly see you are a disgusting human being and cannot be trusted any more than Mitt the Twit Romney.
Republathugs and libtards, one in the same Kool-aid drinkers all in line.
I knew it was only a matter of time until you started on that ignorant line. Go away, you disgust any rational human being.
BTW, most lawyers are educated enough to know when apostrophes are used. I seriously doubt you are anything you say you are or even graduated high school.
…”more men are raped in America than women are.” What? Are you nuts. That’s one of the most ridiculous and irresponsible statements I’ve ever heard.
Exactly! “Half of all domestic violence is committed by women” is equally ludicrous. Even though I was assaulted by a gf once and even threatened with a gun by her, I don’t believe that women commit 50% of all domestic violence.
Up to this post, this person sounded half-way rational. Not now, though.
According to the CDC women are half of all domestic violence, please do your research . This made national headlines.
So you claim. I see no citations now have I ever heard this. I have worked with a shelter for abused women and, as I said, have been attacked by a woman myself. Frankly, based upon my education and experience, what you say is simply not true.
Even if the CDC posted something to that effect, I would still doubt it very much. I do know that the incidence of women being the aggressors is for greater than is generally thought or even reported. But 50%? I throw the bullshit flag.
I think you are a liar.
So the CDC is a liar ,the most well known , well respected and most accurate source in America and the CDC is a liar ? Wow, debating people who do not want to learn anything is just a waste of time, and I did not say I was a lawyer, every one calls me that because I work for a national law for for LGBTs I am a PI, & I go after our opponent’s and dig up dirt on them and destroy them for a living. Alos I am on speaking tours coast to coast.
You are a lair. You have yet to prove a single claim you make about yourself and ignore anything you cannot or so not want to answer. Go away, you disgusting little man.
Michael, according to The Dept Of Justice it is a fact when including men in prison .There is a good video for those who do not like to read Called “Men Raped More Than Women in U.S. ? By “The Young Turks” this made national news. Please stop calling me irresponsible for brining facts and stats to the table.
I see. You are saying that, if it appears on YouTube, it is indisputable fact. You are also ignoring the “statistics” include men in prison. First, I would question statistics essentially supplied by inmates, who have something to gain from reporting assaults of any type.
Then, given the general tone you have taken on here, I would question anything you say in any case.
I don’t allow links Wil, so I will be removing your YouTube link. See the comment policy.
Your argument concerning more men than women raped is both disingenuous and dishonest. Prison claims of rape are grossly exaggerated and have nothing to do with what happens to women.
In my opinion prisoners deserve what they get and they often exchange sex for favors and vice verse. I care nothing about them. If they can’t do the time they shouldn’t do the crime.
Innocent people, women or men in a free society, do not deserve to be violated, much less raped.
Thanks for putting the clamps on this person. I’ve noticed that since I an others have started calling out on his more absurd statements, he has become strangely (or not) quiet.
You have probably noticed yourself how his as avoided answering direct questions about citations or other proof of his claims. When I see that and then a quick disappearance, I know someone has hit the bulls eye on prevarication.
I see. You are saying that, if it appears on YouTube, it is indisputable fact. You are also ignoring the “statistics” include men in prison. First, I would question statistics essentially supplied by inmates, who have something to gain from reporting assaults of any type.
Then, given the general tone you have taken on here, I would question anything you say in any case.
So the U.S Dept Of Justice is a liar as well ? LOL, I give up , you people are Kool-aid liberal’s you are just as bad as the Kool-aid Conservative’s
Aww look at you, getting yer fee fees all hurt when you have to resort to name calling, instead of you know… actually trying to refute all our arguments.
I know I beat my husband daily, so I can get to keeping those stats up Mike. Don’t tell anyone though ok, it will be our secret 😉
Erin, as for the name calling , I have lost all respect for you. If you are a grown woman and choose to call people you are debating negative names, then you are not a fully grown woman, you are stuck in childhood.
It’s hard to take you seriously when you get upset at being called a bigot in the same breath that you say women who strive for equality with men are part of a “hate group.”
Our supposed “100% state and federal rights” have been extremely hard won; men (gay or straight) have historically enjoyed thousands of years of legal superiority over women. Don’t think that the major strides of the last several decades erases that. Maybe you need a refresher on how difficult it has been to fight against sexism: https://www.aclu.org/files/interactive/womensrights_scotus_0303a.html (just a small sampling of major cases).
Trying to alienate more than half of the population from supporting your cause is kind of a bad move, particularly considering that a good chunk of that population is also gay. I say all this as a very strong straight ally who doesn’t work in a law office of any kind but who does understand common sense. (And if you aren’t a lawyer, you might want to talk to one for tips on effectively arguing your side.)
Beth , I have studied women’s rights starting with The Suffragettes prior to 1920 ,and even then there was the” nasty affect”, when these women handed out white feathers to men who were not serving in the military during WW1 and the feathers of white were “shame feathers” to shame all and any men who did not or could not serve. I work for a national law firm, and am on the road constantly speaking through out all 50 states and the biggest name’s in the LGBT world are not friends with feminist what so ever due to thier snarky history and present stance with gay men especially, and when I was called from a well known feminist to join movements I asked one simple questiuon, ( “what rights are you lacking”) She had no answer, I hung up, end of story.
What rights are we lacking, really REALLY. Are you fuckin serious here, with the amount of government intrusion into what we do with our bodies and we are not having rights taken away. In some states a rapist, yeah a RAPIST, has more rights to our bodies than we do if they impregnate us. The fact that a whole bunch of white republican men are taking away our body autonomy is a right I don’t want taken away. I think you meant to stop on the He man women hater’s club blog. It is thataways>>>>>>>
You are not very bright with history! Gay men have enjoyed rights for thousands of years ? Tell me what rights I had all those years when gay men were placed in mental institutions and had labotmy’s performed along with electric shock , and beaten and killed and burned in heaps called ” faggots” and could not be with the one they loved or serve in he military or be in the boy scouts . Are you kidding ? Gay men are the most beaten and killed and discriminated people alive and I have male legal superioroity over a straight women? WOW! Are you uneducated or what? Straight American women have ALWAYS had it much easier than a gay male’s, so much so that its ridiculous, we could not even visit each other in the hospital until recently . Please do your history on us, I read your history.Disturbing indeed.
There are lots of us horrid women on your side you know, it is not you against the world. Not for nothing, but during the AIDS crisis of the 8-s and 90s it was the lesbians that stepped up to help take care of people afflicted with AIDS, so don’t get it twisted there Mary. Before you tell me to go research history, my aunt, who just happens to be lesbian and her wife, were heavily involved with the early days of taking care of people with AIDS and the whole early ACT UP org and they have taught me very well about things that have happened to them as lesbians and the LGBT community at large. Just this year I got a serious beatdown, for coming to the aid of my best friend who is a gay man when he was being gay bashed, so you don’t have to be all nasty to people who are on your side. It is a human issue. The end.
To this day I live with the scares of being one of those statistics , I was stabbed eleven times and beaten into a coma and was in the ICU for days and had to learn to walk, and speak all over again just for walking out of a gay club. I had no idea how much superiority I had over you, and all this time I needed a sight dog to get around and I was so foolish to think I had it rough and you have it so hard. Oh my male superiority.
It’s a shame that you can’t seem to recognize allies to your cause. Why make women as a group your enemy?
I have zero interest in continuing this conversation, since you’re not paying attention to the meaning of my words, instead twisting them to support some strange notion that I’m attacking you. This does absolutely nothing for you except make you look like a troll.
Good luck to you.
Beth when you can tell me facts that gay men had it easier than straight women through out history and give me historical documentation proving your stance I will accept your argument. Straight women have had a far easier life than any gay man in history.
Beth-So many people have tried to reason with Wil/Will, to no avail. LGBT activists have tried to reason with him, and he just keeps screaming about how much he hates women. Sorry, feminists. As to the “name calling,” Wil/Will, you are a bigot, and the stuff you posted on my Facebook wall before I blocked you was really angry and disturbing. I am a survivor of domestic violence and sexual assault, but I am not filled with hate and anger the way you seem to be.
Erin, what gay activist ? I have not met one gay activist on here, and any one can call say they are an activist even if it is a poat stating they are. I am actually on the ground floor of the LGBT movement at a national firm and every one there is tired of feminist and that is over 400 LGBT’s . I do not hate women but I do not respect feminist. I do not hate black people ,but I do not respect the Black Panther’s ,and I do not hate white men, but I loath the KKK. I am tired of the feminsit screaming names at straight men , or any man for that matter, and as for my so called anger, that is your oppinion. I have a fantastic life with a great partner that is a pilot for a national airilne and two wonderful children and a home I look forword to coming to after being on he road dealing with every one from the Phelps to other hate groups. When you can give me a list of rights that you are lacking ( state or federal )I will continue this conversation, but with out stats and facts , you are just a complainer.
Here is a right you might wanna look up there Mary. VA, we have to wait x amount of time before we can make a decision on whether or not we want to rid ourself of an unwanted child. While we are doing that waiting in some states, we can have the doctor lying bold faced to us about breast cancer, fetal heartbeats, fetii feeling pain at less than x weeks(OH), we have to have unnecessary medical procedures done by vaginal ultrasound. Lesbians being raped straight, yeah they are just lesbians so that may not count in your world right? I’m paraphrasing you here, but anyone can be anything on the internet right. So who is to say you can be trusted that you work in a law office with 400 LGBTs, which hint, usually the LGBT community doesn’t refer to themselves this way. Just sayin you and your anyone can be anyone or anything, could be you amirite?
Calling me “Mary” ? Do you know that is as bad as calling a black person a “nigger” ?
Um, no, no it’s not when I have honorary gay status in the San Francisco bay area, from more than a few of my Castro st bros and sisters. But you go on with yer bad self, trying to get bent about that insult and not address the actual post, after you go on insulting women. I can take it.
I had to wait for one yr for a surgery in the state of Fl., it was a law there ,and I am a male ,so what ? You are not lacking any rights ,and if you were you need to site the law and the code number and if it is state or federal.
Well doh. The author of this exact post has had some dealings as far as gay activism. His husband, he is the guy that dared, yes DARED asked a question about DADT at one of the republican primary debates and was most disgustingly booed and not one of the candidates stood up for him, a member of the military. You keep saying you work at some big legal firm, I’m going to go out on a limb to say, you probably don’t win many cases with the terrible research skills you have. Another guess here, you belong to GoProud doncha? If so, that explains everything about you and the rest I don’t even want to know.
No I am not part of GOProud ,I am a huge Obama Supporter !
This is clearly one disturbed individual. The rabid nature of his outbursts make me wonder if it’s a troll trying to subvert the cause.
Of course I am a “troll”, every one that is not on your side on the internet is instantly reguarded as a “troll”. It is a word people use when they do not know how to debate an issue with substance. Also accusing some one of “mental illness” is a common statement used by most internet user’s as is “sociopath” etc .
Erin, what does being a ” survivor of domestic violence and rape” have to do with feminism or LGBT rights ? Half of all domestic violence is commited by women, and more men are raped in America than women are.
You say you are a lawyer and you don’t know how to look up these facts that get taught in second yr of law school. Where are you doing yer lawyering, Dewey Cheatem and Howe.
I am a PI, I have stated that a million times , every one calls me a lawyer due to the fact I state I work for a natonal LGBT law firm.
You are a PI, that is private investigator right? If so, that makes it much worse, coz you have investigation right there in yer damn job title and you don’t do that it seems.
Now you are a PI? No, you have not stated that at all, much less “a million times”. Strange how you “forgot to mention this until you are called out about being a lawyer. But you did state several times that you work for a law firm, although no proof was given. WHy6 don;t you name the firm if it’s a “national LGBT” firm? Are you afraid someone wold contact them and learn they have no one such as you working there?
A reasonable person would assume that statement was to mean you were a lawyer. But, not being a lawyer, you don’t understand the legal concept of a “reasonable person.” It seems you don;t understand much about truth and verifiable evidence, either.
Yep people, a fake and a troll.
Also on the topic of “equality” there is no such thing. No one is equal. I am not equal to a man serving in the front lines, I am not equal to a convicted pedophile or a woman with six children and no job or finacial help. We can make things equal when it comes to civil rights but “equality” can never be nor do I want it to be.
If you read some articles about gay men written by current feminist , they are hate filled. One is “MISANDRY: Feminist Gay Bashing”,the other is “Feminist Need To Stop Stitching up Gay Designers”, and there is a feminist group that is against gay marriage, and another rejects transgender people and the awful name calling and hate of my straight brother’s is enough to make me sick. I do not approve of any hate group, not the KKK, or the Black Panther’s or Feminist.
Mike, this was exactly what I was speaking about on a thread you posted on feminism a while back. That is why I was so irratated. Straight American Females have 100% state & federal rights and working for my civil rights through a national law firm was confused when the third wave of feminism took front lines with Atheism + and nation wide. LGBTs are lacking 1700 state and federal rights not to mention the most beaten and killed and discriminated minority in America. Thank you for this post.
Woohoo! Wil the woman hating “lawyer” is back. Hey, Wil, did you know that women and the LGBT community are (gasp) working together? That most gay men aren’t hateful bigots like you? I know, weird, huh?
Erin, I do not hate women, but I do not get along with feminist as feminist have a long history trashing gay men. I work for a national LGBT rights law firm and I am unaware of the combination of feminism and LGBT rights. Straight women have full rights, you do not have a civil rights cause.
Again I do agree with your points. For those opposed to LGBT rights, it is a single issue and that is one of religious intolerance.
Many times I have presented the question, “What does gay marriage harm?” When the question is not ignored, the answers always come down to, “It’s an abomination!” IN other words, it’s a religious issue and no other.
I have a relative that is gay and his partner died of lung cancer last month. They avoided the hospital visitation issue by turning part of their home into a hospice. As the partner was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, they knew it was now only a matter of a few weeks so extraordinary measures would not help. At least they were together when the end came. That would not have been possible if the bigots had their way.