The Continuing Adventures Of Billy No Mates
Billy No Mates has occasionally been renamed Billy Bastard – mainly because he can be a complete bastard you know. He seems to be obsessed with doing things of an unspeakable nature to Purrdy – but she is, frankly, a tart. She shoves her ass in his face and then squeals when he responds – typical woman eh? Oops – I’m in trouble again 😉
Billy No Mates IS neutered I hasten to add. As responsible cat owners we are aware that there are more than enough cats in the world and by neutering him we are ‘doing our bit’ to protect him from FIV and FELV and so forth. (For the uninitiated FIV is the cat version of AIDS – give or take – and FELV is the cat version of – I’ve forgotten – anyways it’s a nasty illness that will kill them as it will kill us. Feline Leukemia? – How DO you spell that? Oh good grief – I have an English ‘O’ Level and I can’t spell it. My apologies, I am getting old and prone to forgetfulness. Or is it ‘forgetfullness’ with another ‘l’. Oh I don’t know, it’s hopeless).
Anyway. Billy No Mates continues on his adventures oblivious to the world – and good for him eh? If only we could all be oblivious to the world!
Gracie Mae The Fruit Bat is currently ‘having an issue’ with Marie Bug as Marie Bug has decided that Gracie Mae The Fruit Bat is her arch enemy. We have no idea why Marie Bug has reached this conclusion but, then again, we aren’t cats are we?
Anyway, Gracie Mae The Fruit Bat has taken to Billy No Mates as her protector and he is, currently, living up to Gracie Mae The Fruit Bat’s expectations.
Well, at least he hasn’t tried to shag her yet, and for Billy No Mates that is a plus!

About Post Author
Neil Bamforth
More Stories
Those Amazing K9s—Heroes at Work, Friends at Home
I think most know that the collaboration between humans and animals, in this case, police dogs, is crucial in...
Back to the Bark: Axel, Piper, and Tango Run Together Once Again
Oh, the wild and whimsical world of owning three spirited dogs, each a character in their own right! The morning...
Paws, Tails, and Trails: Exercising with Axel, Tango, and Piper
[caption id="attachment_188032" align="aligncenter" width="612"] Well-raised and trained Malinois are usually active, intelligent, friendly, protective, alert and hard-working.[/caption] Oh, the joys...
Paws in Pursuit of Justice: The Role of Police Dogs in Law Enforcement
The realm of law enforcement is an ever-changing landscape where the collaboration between humans and animals plays a crucial role...
A Dog Is Not Your Shield
Don't rely on a dog to protect you from the world. Dogs are wonderful companions, but they are not shields. The...
Dog Collars: The Hazards of Choke Chains
Choke chains are collars that tighten around a dog's neck when they pull on the leash. This is intended to...
Billy No Mates is distraught that nobody cares to comment.
Actually, his adventures have probably run their natural course so I will resist contributing anymore.
Well, I will until he grows to 80 feet and attacks Central London anyway 😉
Billy is grateful to have been here.
Actually, as he is a cat and no idea that he had been here he couldn’t give a toss.
I could though – so thank you for enjoying his adventures.
I’ll save a few up over the next few months and shove them in ‘en masse’ – it’ll be fun when it happens.
T’ra from Billy No Mates
….for now 😉