Taking A Stand Against the Donald

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I’m finally back. I know, I said I was only going to take a break for a month, but life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans. Actually, if I’m being completely honest, after the election, I was so disgusted by the results that I was seriously considering not coming back to MMA at all.

I spent a year making fun of the Cheeto-faced Shitgibbon and I couldn’t help feeling like it amounted to nothing. I sure as Hell didn’t want to keep doing it for another four years. I mean, yeah- it would keep me employed, but where’s the challenge? Making fun of Donald J. Trump is like hunting a deer that walks right up to you, points the shotgun at it’s head, and pulls the trigger. It’s not a challenge.

I really thought I could sit back and ignore him. I was ready to sit back with a bottle of Guinness in my hand and watch him light the world on fire. Every friend I have in the world was like, “Greg, shouldn’t you be mad as Hell about Trump?” I shot back, “This country obviously doesn’t care that they voted for a total moron, so why should I?”

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But then I heard a few interesting tidbits- First and foremost, Trump did not win the popular vote. He lost it by almost three million votes. The Electoral College handed him the presidency. Second, I was disgusted by Trump’s attitude. I stupidly thought the tangerine douchebag would soften and start acting presidential, but that was only wishful thinking. If anything, he got worse. It didn’t help that his idiot followers started acting like it was okay to be total assholes in the wake of Trump’s victory. It seemed like almost every racist and white conservative was given permission to be a dick overnight. I mean, they’re pretty much dicks to begin with, but you’d think somebody had sent out an E-vite!

The final straw was when it came out that the Russians had helped put Trump in the White House. Look, I can accept Trump winning the election. What I can’t accept is that a foreign power interfered in our electoral process and stuck us with a total dipshit in the oval office. I was even MORE pissed off that Trump’s groupies- who, for eight years, called Obama a communist (among other names I choose not to repeat,) were suddenly okay with having a president who basically doubles as Vladimir Putin’s butt-boy!

I mean, hypocritical much?

Even with all that, I STILL wasn’t ready to come back to MMA. So when Mad Mike finally decided enough was enough and asked me when I was gonna get back to doing what I do best, I had no idea what to tell him. Mad Mike has always been good to me, and I consider him my mentor, as well as a close friend. I really didn’t want to disappoint him.

The thing is- if I’m going to get back in this fight, I want to approach it differently. Making fun of Trump, while entertaining, isn’t going to accomplish anything. Then I realized something; the next few years are going to be pretty dismal, if not downright depressing. People are going to need something to laugh about as well as have an outlet to vent their anger towards orange Julius Caesar. I guess if I can provide that, then I have served a purpose, and if it pisses off Trump at some point, even better. A mosquito can be an annoyance, but if it bites you enough times, it’s going to hurt like Hell.

In that case, I guess you can consider this my declaration of war. Resistance is not futile.

About Post Author

Gregory B. Gonzalez

Gregory B. Gonzalez is an angry black man who isn't actually black. No, really- he told us to say that! His parents once had him tested for Tourette's, but when the doctor came back with his results, he said, "No, he's fine. Your son is just an a**hole!" It's been downhill ever since. He lives like the Unabomber, only without the explosives. Feel free to contact him provided you can actually locate him. Just keep in mind that he'll probably make fun of you to your face. We here at MMA can't stand him, so if you want him, he's all yours!

scoundrel727@gmail.com