- CRITTER TALK
- NEWS I FIND INTERESTING
Now, as an ardent ‘Brexiteer,’ one of those who wanted to leave the Union are called, I voted to remain in the EU. I did this primarily as my daughter and her partner who are, not surprisingly, younger than me, wanted to remain. I discovered with only a modicum of research that the vast majority of young people wished to remain.
I therefore sacrificed my democratic right to vote the way I wanted and voted for the future the young people wanted.
Any suggestion that I voted against my true desire just so I could be a contrary bastard might also have a degree of truth about it.
Anyway, much to my surprise and former Prime Minister David Cameron’s surprise – having something in common with him is quite worrying to me – Britain or, if you prefer, The United Kingdom, voted to leave.
Since then not a great deal of any consequence has happened other than current Prime Minister, Theresa May, has continually insisted that ‘Brexit means Brexit’, which is fine and dandy except nobody actually knows precisely what ‘Brexit’ means – other than it means ‘Brexit’ but we don’t know what that means. It is an invented word that has yet to appear in The Oxford Concise Dictionary.
With me so far? Jolly good.
There are politicians and others frequently waffling on about both ‘hard’ and ‘soft’ Brexits.
Personally, being a red blooded male the term ‘Hard Brexit’ sounds far more virile than ‘Soft Brexit’ which sounds like the entire country may need a large dose of Viagra.
There are clear positives regarding Britain’s decision to leave The European Union. Said decision has upset the French and Germans for one thing.
I mean to say, what is the point of France and Germany if we can’t upset them on a regular basis. It’s just too much fun to not do it.
Until recently, or to be accurate, precisely now as I type and wonder where the hell I am going here, it has suddenly dawned on me that Great Britain and America have possibly even more in common now than they have ever had.
America has Trump and has no idea what is going to happen next.
Britain has ‘Brexit’ and has no idea what is going to happen next.
I am typing at my PC and have no idea what I am going to say next.
As far as I can gather – and, yes, I know given my simplistic way of looking at things what I can gather is often very little – Britain has the choice of –
‘Hard Brexit’ which, in a nutshell, seems to be a kind of :
“Right European Union. Piss off and no you aren’t having any money off us and see this middle finger? It’s for you”
or ‘Soft Brexit’ which, in a nutshell, seems to be a kind of :
“Oh dear European Union, it’s all a mistake, don’t blame us blame the people and here’s 50 kazillion dollar / pounds and please don’t hate us”
Well, I did say in a nutshell.
Over in America meanwhile there is Trump.
Will he be impeached? Is he a Russian agent? Will he build a wall on the Mexican border? Will he blow up North Korea or, possibly, Australia in the mistaken belief it is North Korea?
So you see, Britain and America have an incredible amount in common quite simply because none of us have a bloody clue where our respective countries are heading or whether the outcome will be hard or soft.
All I can shed onto our current mystifying circumstances is this.
If I come to the USA and meet Jennifer Aniston my reaction will have nothing what so ever to do with a ‘Hard Brexit’ albeit I will be pleased to see her.
In the meantime as Britain ponders what the hell is going to happen and America likewise, may I suggest that we enter Ostrich mode, chill the hell out, drink lots of beer and let Hard Brexit, Trump, North Korea, Soft Brexit, Mexican Walls and Russian spies within or without The White House just get on with it.
We’re the ‘little people’ so we might as well just get drunk and, frankly, fuck ’em all as they will all assuredly fuck us – which, with the exception of me and Jennifer Aniston – is a dead certainty.
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