Why Scammers Are Scumbags

by Neil Bamforth

My mother rang me up yesterday to ‘pick my brains,’ and yes, I know, this was a very brave thing to do given the workings of my brain. She had answered her telephone to a man with a strong Asian accent advising her that, as her internet connection was having difficulties, he required her name, address, date of birth and bank account details to sort it all out.

My mother’s response to him of “What’s an internet?” didn’t seem to deter him and he asked for the information again. My mother, thankfully, hung up. Then she called me to ask if she had done the right thing.

I advised her that she had but, for future reference, she should say “Bugger off” before actually hanging up.

My mother hasn’t got a computer. She is eighty-eight years old and wouldn’t know what to do with one, apart from dust it occasionally.

Never the less, scumbag scammer rang her up in an attempt to get personal information from her.

Now, most people would know to say “Bugger off” – or words to that effect – and hang up. Elderly people often don’t understand this brave new technological world. They are used to presuming anyone who takes the trouble to call them must be genuine. Why else would they bother to call?

Shortly before my best pal’s mum passed away, she had to go into a care home due to dementia. As my pal and his brothers were sorting through her paperwork they discovered she was paying three different direct debits from her bank account to separate insurance companies for insurance on a Sky TV box.

A Sky TV box that she didn’t have and, indeed, had never had.

My pal called all three companies and gave them the choice of fully refunding all monies paid or the Insurance Ombudsman would be involved. All three companies, after trying to justify the unjustifiable, refunded the monies to her bank account.

You see, the insurance companies were legitimate companies. Their policy of cold calling, however, had resulted in a confused old lady handing over her money to them to ensure something she didn’t even have. This, to me, proves that ‘cold calling’ is merely another form of scamming.

My landline is only used for internet connection. We never make calls on it and never receive calls on it. Well, apart from my wife’s friend, Fiona. Fiona has a mobile phone that she takes everywhere with her, but it is always switched off. She never makes calls on it and, if you ring it and leave a message, she doesn’t know how to listen to the messages.

As a result, when our land line rings, I have to answer it in case it is Fiona.

It rarely is. It is usually ‘Roger’ calling or, it may be ‘Patrick’ or ‘Timothy’. Their accents invariably give away the fact that they are actually called Ravinder or Jasvinder or something.

“Hello,” I say on answering

“Hello, thees ees Peeter culling vrom Microsoft. Ve ave find a virus on your PC. Ve need agzess to your PC to remove eet”

“Hello, Peter. Fuck off and get a life”

Why do they do it? Do they really think anyone is stupid enough to even listen to them? Well, yes they do actually because, after watching a TV program about this, it is quite extraordinary how many people are actually stupid enough to listen to them, and not necessarily elderly people either.

On the TV program, people in their thirties and forties talked of how they believed the caller was from Microsoft. Then they gave them access to their PC. A virus was then placed on their PC and they had to pay to have it removed by the caller who had put it there in the first place.

How dumb can anyone be?

Other people on the program believed it was their bank ringing them up. Banks never ring you up. Well, if they do they certainly don’t ask for information such as your PIN number and account details, yet so many people are falling for it.

Some lost thousands of pounds. Unbelievable.

I received a call a few months ago.

“This is Sally from The Nationwide Building Society. We have seen an unusual use of your account and need to make sure it is you who have used it. I need your account and security details to protect your account”

“This is Neil telling you to shove your head up your ass.”

The line went dead.

My wife tells me I should just hang up and not bother offending them. I disagree. It may be they are not offended. It may be they have hides like rhinos and couldn’t care less if I swear at them and so forth but, it is just possible that the odd one will be upset when told to ‘fuck off’ or to ‘shove their heads up their ass’.

If just the odd one doesn’t like it or, even better, is upset by it, then my work here is done.

Scammers are part of the breed that can only be referred to as ‘scum of the Earth’. They are not deserving of any respect what so ever. Cold callers? Well, perhaps it’s the only job they can get. Cold callers are not, perhaps, quite in the same league as scammers but, frankly, if that’s the best job they can get then it’s their problem if they don’t like verbal abuse.

Go and get a proper job.

Oddly, this morning on BBC Breakfast TV, this very topic was being spoken about. Nice to know I’m in tune with the Beeb.

Wow! Talk about current! Just now, after typing the above, I answered the landline. A chap claiming to be a police officer stated my bank account had been used for fraud! He said I had to empty it immediately into a ‘safe’ account and gave me the account number.

Up to this point, he hadn’t let me get a word in. Finally, I did.

“Knobhead”

I then hung up. If the police turn up and ask me why I called Detective Inspector Johnson a knobhead, I may be unavailable for a short time.

Scammers are scum. End of.

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %